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Girl Trouble
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by
on 2007-10-03 14:19:48 (edited 2007-10-03 14:22:25)
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Hey,there,all of Gendou,It's me again. I need some advice. You see,my friend introduced me to this girl that really likes me and she gave me this note talking about why she likes me and complementing me. I thought to myself,''Ok,this girl really likes me(obviously) So I went with it. The following day she gave me another note. This time with hearts on it. I thought,''this is cute,'' I read the note and it sounded nice but about halfway through it I saw the words 'before we got together I...'. I'm reading it going,''Wtf,we never got together.''. So I rolled with it for about a week or so, and then somehow,almost evrybody in school new about this,appearently,my friend can't keep his frickin' mouth shut to save his life. Anyway,these rumors started about her,Not good one either. I went to go ask her about these rumors today,And it turns out she is a pschyco. I'm talkin' crazy,cuts herself,maniacal,the works. And the worst part,she's SUICIDAL!!Yeah,that's right. She is willing to kill herself for the simplist thing. She was in the hospital for about a week for cutting her ankle. Now,I want to break up with her and tell her we're just friends,but,I'm afraid if I do she'll go off the deep end and kill herself. And I don't want a friend to die. And I'm afraid if she does die then I'll feel like it's my fault. So please,All of Gendou,I'm asking you,WTF SHOULD I DO!!!???  |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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Just psycho? That sounds like not that bad of a catch. I can go into a whole lots of reasons why a suicidal psycho girlfriend is great to have. First off, I myself am the same. I am a suicidal psycho boyfriend, but Honeyko and I are a great couple in case you haven't heard. First off suicidal people will treasure their spouse like crazy. Because a lot of them are suicidal because of loneliness and the need to be with someone. You can be sure that they will treat you more important than anything else in the world. Psychos just need a little love. One thing though is if you want to be with one, you MUST be committed. It not like a casual relationship that you can break off if it doesn't go well. We crazies become attached like super glue. It is in a way a good thing. It makes us incredibly loyal, obsessed, smothering, and always wanting to be near. If you are looking for some serious romance and love, then look no further than the crazy ones. If you think the girl is cute, you would like to spend eternity forever with her, and desire a strong loving relationship. Then I fully recommend this suicidal psycho. As long as the bond between you and her is strong you don't have to worry about her killing herself. If you are not willing to get into such a serious relationship, break off immediately. I can go into more clarification about the suicidal mindset if you have any more concerns or worries about you choice's consequences. Something like this should be giving deep consideration and consultation.  Jomunga eats your avatars. |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
 
on 2007-10-03 14:48:31 |
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Darn, Jomunga beat me to it x3 I agree completely with him! (No, I am not in a relationship, nor do I know anyone 'psycho') But, if you think about what he said...it's 100% true. |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
on 2007-10-03 18:21:06 |
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uh I'm going to have to disagree ._." Where the mindset I'll agree with I don't think they make good partners...having dated one. I dunno how old you are but I'm gonna say sorta young and frankly teenagers have enough drama of their own so the last thing they need is someone else's issues on them. Obviously this girl does have issues. You really should have tried to get to know her more before you let it keep rolling. As you now see you can get yourself into things you're not prepared for. As far as I can tell it doesn't appear you really even have much for feelings for her. So ending it now is of course the best choice. Whatever you do though don't accuse her of anything. Let her know that you're just not ready for a such a serious relationship, that' you're sorry but you think it'd be better if you go seperate ways. If she does end up trying to kill herself over thins you do have to know it's not your fault. it's her choice. |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
 
on 2007-10-03 19:32:47 |
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As I usaully am, I am neutral. I agree with both sides. 1:Psycho's just need a little love (true, they embrace every single thing that you do[I.E.smile, hug, accidentally touching hands]) 2.It's not your fault.[If she hurts herself](you don't control her.. sadly that's what most people don't take in.) One must ask that if s/he tells me "I have nothing to live for but you", what was s/he's dream? of course they're going to say something is stopping them(I.E. abusive parents, friends, things that could have led them to be like this) and try and help them out. though that would be making her/him more attracted to you. But how does one break off without leaving memories and other things that could lead the person you wanted to break off dead? Well. it's easy really. Show her/him that you are the wrong person s/he picked. it's going to ruin your image, I know but it's a bit more less lethal than other methods. although she could punish herself for "being idiotic and not seeing her/him's true side" and that will be hard with a ruined image. so, make her walk of feeling disgusted or in some manner that in a way, she might..well.. hate you.. that way, she leaves of thinking "what was I doing with that guy?, heh, good luck in life!" although that's my limit. I don't know any other technique than that. ...goodluck. x]   |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
on 2007-10-03 19:59:14 |
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And as for me, I'm easily affected by what other ppl say -.-; Cause just now, I think Sprity's comments make sense too.... Even though we have our own opinions, to the end it's really your choice whether or not to continue with this relationship. Just remember, whatever choice you make, don't live to regret it later on in your life. Good luck :) |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
 
on 2007-10-03 20:13:33 (edited 2007-10-03 20:16:49)
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Sorry pal, I can only give you advice. This is something you need to do yourself. Girls are... emotional. Emotions pretty much drives most of them. Having spent time, money and things (I will not go into details but you got an idea) girls/women are overall emotionally driven. (Okay, I just repeated that point 3 times already in 2 lines...) Anyways, Right now, the "relationship" is not as much of a bond as it will be if this continues. You can choose your path, Tell her to stop it and cut it out. (Please do so sincerely. If she's really psycho, this may tear her up) or Continue with the relationship and get to know her (of course, this means a harder time of breaking up and leaving a chance for a bigger emotional scar on yourself and her than breaking it off. However, the good results can last forever if the relationship works out) or You can ALWAYS make a option C. Whatever it is. (I'm a hardcore believer for option C, which basically is "I'll do it my way.") Good Luck Man. I hope you will not regret making whatever decision you make. See ya in the near future whether on Gendou.com or somewhere on Earth. SkyL  |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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OK, this is my take. If someone is truly a danger to themselves, or others, they need professional help. You are not a mental health professional, therefore you should distance yourself from this person, Be polite but be firm. Let her know you can be friend but you do not feel ready for a serious commitment. At the first sign that this person displays a willingness to hurt herself, or others, you need to get authorities involved immediately. You also should have a conversation with your parents because with something that's as serious as you make this sound, they have a right to be aware of the whole matter. And if she expresses a willingness to hurt herself, in your presence, be aware that this is nothing more than emotional blackmail. It is NOT an expression of her love for you. You absolutely must not give in to it, if you do, that only reinforces her behavior and makes it even stronger and therefore more dangerous, next time. Like frat said, you are NOT responsible for her actions, all you have control over is your own. All people need love, regardless of their mental state, but not all people are ready for it. They must first be in a reasonably healthy state of mind in order to have a healthy relationship. I can't speak to Jomunga's situation but I must respectfully disagree with his advice to you. You are too young for a lifelong commitment and certainly not ready for something that can put you, or this girl, in situation that can permanently change lives and not just yours, but others around you. Mental instability affects not just the individual but all the people within that person's area of influence. Surely you've seen movies like Basic Instinct or Fear? Certainly not every "psycho" person will react in those ways but the problem is that by definition, they are unstable, and that means you can't really judge how they will react. Which people are harmlessly psycho and which people can turn violent, even professionals get surprised sometimes. I'm trying not to write a book but this is certainly a challenging situation and it's difficult to feel like I've said enough. To recap: 1) talk to your parents. 2) To the girl, be polite but firm, say something like things are moving too fast for you, you're not ready for commitment, and you'd like be friends. Say this to her, directly, do NOT go through intermediaries, where words will get distorted and who knows what the heck kind of impression she'll end up with. 3) give her space, and Try not to let ehr get you alone. She's more likely to show some self restraint if other people are around. If she approaches you acting dangerously emotional, get authorities involved. If she calls you acting dangerously motional, get authorities involved. regards, yoshi |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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(a lil disagree with jomunga) anyways..talk to the girl's parents or better way would be talk to the girl's best friends or good friends, they might be helpful... =]
.....hA-n|-k0
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yOu'Ve bOuNd mY sOuL tO uRs bY aN UnBrEakAblE ChA|n.. <3 .. I lOvE U fOrEvEr ... MY HONEY ISH SOO CUTE |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
on 2007-10-04 03:28:26 |
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^The way the girl was described sounded like she's alienated from society. I know a few people like that as well. No real friends to count on and possibly hates her parents, but who knows. @Yoshi Not everyone needs love. Or at least the type you are talking about. You are definitely forgetting people who are single till they died. Also, telling authorities... It depends, like honey' ko said, it's better to talk to the people she has like a best friend or their parents. If she's really going to plan on suiciding, then bring in a counselor. Also, no one is too young to make any lifelong commitments. It just depends on the person. I have a friend that has managed to stay with a girlfriend since elementary school. Now they're in the same college and very... active. Haha. Anyways, do what's right. Don't regret anything. SkyL (Again >.<) |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
on 2007-10-04 12:49:19 (edited 2007-10-04 12:50:35)
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Man Kakashi, you seem to get yourself in some tight spots when it comes to girls. Better be careful or this could become a reoccurring thing. Anyway, I agree with bits and pieces of what everyone else is saying. I mostly agree with Jomunga's take on it. If she's hurting herself and looks to be a little "psycho" then she needs help. These things aren't always something you can make better just by loving them back or talking it out with them, it just doesn't work sometimes. In fact, loving the person back when they may well be a little crazy is probably the worst thing to do in a sense. The more they grow attached to you or the more involved with them you get then the likelier it is they could do something rash if the smallest thing goes wrong. The best thing to do is talk to your parents and get them to have a talk with the girls parents about this. It's a hard thing to do of course, but since you think of her as a friend then you have to help and the best way to do that is to talk about it with someone else who can do something. Never try and take matters like this into your own hands, that's the main message I'm getting at.    |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
on 2007-10-04 19:42:22 |
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aow.. dealing problem with psychos is hard and unpredictable. if i'm not mistaken there are three types of psychos: mental disorder, paranoia and schizophrenia.. from your description she may have slightly a mental disorder or low level of paranoia (well, i hope she is not schizophrenia type, because that will be very hard).. treating or helping her will depends on what type of psycho she has (i think you need to talk with experts).. but, she maybe not a psycho!..i think she maybe doesn't have any confidence of herself. this will make her feels that she is useless and don't deserve to live (trying to kill herself, that's the prove of it). and if this one is occurring to the girl, you can cure her. giving her attention and encourage her to be more confidence may can cure her, although this takes time. and you can't take this thing alone. you need help. talking to your parent can be useful or it can make it worse, as we know that some parents are overprotective to their children. if you have an overprotective parents, telling them will make it worse. i agree with honey'ko, talking to the girl's best friend/or good friend will always help you (unless if her friend also psycho). and also talk about this with your best friend.  |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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infact, just to see if it helps, show her how bad habit u have, a lil bit like pretending. maybe spit on the ground, tell her how you was a jerk to your ex-gf.. and some other action that might let her feel disgusted about u... dont forget to curse too :P
.....hA-n|-k0
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yOu'Ve bOuNd mY sOuL tO uRs bY aN UnBrEakAblE ChA|n.. <3 .. I lOvE U fOrEvEr ... MY HONEY ISH SOO CUTE |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
on 2007-11-01 14:41:55 |
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Wow,Guys/Girls,You really helped me. I used a little bit of everyone's advice(Mostly Honey'Ko's last post) And not only does she think I'm a ''disgusting creepaziod bastard''(Her words),but she thinks that we be friends and broke up with me three days ago. Thanks to you all,And I now know that the good people of Gendou can help you out no matter what your problem is. May our paths cross again. Later! |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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by
on 2007-11-02 18:10:37 |
Well good for you Kakashi. 
 |
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Re: Girl Trouble
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hahah. u r welcome. i think i watched too much movie , thats why .. lol
.....hA-n|-k0
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yOu'Ve bOuNd mY sOuL tO uRs bY aN UnBrEakAblE ChA|n.. <3 .. I lOvE U fOrEvEr ... MY HONEY ISH SOO CUTE |