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A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
 
on 2007-10-25 20:15:45 (edited 2007-10-25 20:36:46)
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I have an issue. My mother just won't stop pestering me over stuff and I'm freaking 18. What the hell. Anyways, today she just goes on and on about stuff and I'm typing my essay ignoring every single word she says because I hear the same exact words, sentences and phrases EVERY SINGLE DAY! It's like she has a f***ing schedule to rant on and on. Then she says how I should go live alone and stuff (which I've been saying that to her since I turned 18). Here's the thing, the day I packed my suitcases to go out to the real world, she stopped me. She tells me that she's gonna help me get ready. And I was thinking, "What the f***?!" Then today she complains how I ONLY say hi to her in the morning and goodnight at night and wants me to have more social time with them. That pissed me off. I understand her feelings about letting me go but all birds need to leave the nest someday don't they? I don't shout at my mom though. She owns me regardless if she's gonna give me s**t reasoning. But I'm almost fed up with this. It's annoying about how this has been going on and on and I'm surprised about the long patience I have. She gives me all this crap about I'm not independent and I can't live alone in the world even though I have proven it many times that I can go out now and do not need her like last year when I was in high school and can't do anything as a minor. Then she tells me that we should have more talking time together and stuff. I understand but hey, she's never gonna see me everyday once I go to a dorm in a college. She needs to get used to it. She still has my little sister. Yet, my sister, I'm the one that's raising her!... I'll talk about that some other day cause I'm going off topic. Anyways, what do you guys think? I know I just ranted so just answer the topic question if you want.  |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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I'm guessing you're her first child. If that's so she might just have trouble coming to terms with the fact that you are grown and never wants to let you go. Also it may make her feel old and feeling old brings your thoughts closer to death, so maybe the longer she keeps you around the better she feels?  |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
on 2007-10-25 20:35:40 (edited 2007-10-25 20:36:05)
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^My answer to that thought (which I saw this one in her) is: Get used to it. It's natural. But I still love my mum... even though she can be a pain in the @$$ and yes, I'm the first "successful" child. There would've been a brother 3 yrs older than me if that one wasn't a miscarriage... |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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That miscarriage could also contribute to her not wanting to let go, maybe she doesn't want to lose you like she lost that baby. |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
on 2007-10-25 22:00:04 |
^it only proves that ur mom loves u hahahahah xD 
 |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
on 2007-10-26 04:54:01 |
| Yeah, for me it is... When parents love,sometimes, no, oftentimes, they get strict and more... They don't even permit me to go to friends' outing... I always get jealous of my other classmates... |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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Sometimes parents' love maybe excessive and make us feel stress.But we can't scold them or ignore them.Cuz all they do is just want us to stay by their sides and dont wanna lose us. But come to think of it,why parents are worrying about us all the time?Is it our behavior are too childish or our attitude cant get their trust? I can't deny that some of the parents are really over worrying but most of the parents are really care of us. So what we can do to gain their trust is to behave ourselves.And also try to talk to them nicely,try to tell them how you feel. Maybe after some time they discover something and give us freedom.^^ Good Luck anyway...  |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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er... thats because your mom love you~ but parents' love sometimes make them overprotective... and i dun like it~ |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
on 2007-12-31 01:08:19 |
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*_* same here... i dont like super duper overprotective parents but well im happy with my life now since i liv alone ;p and i understand if my mom wants me to be with her all the time during breaks muak muak muak
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
 
on 2007-12-31 04:02:05 (edited 2007-12-31 04:06:25)
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Okay, your momma there was being clingy, moody, complaining and indecisive over your decision to leave and live alone. She thought you are not gonna come back forever during holidays and important family times. She was just being such a drama queen there, leaving you in such lost oblivion. If you believe you can survive on your own, you should, and your momma should not take your decision in extreme pessimism. I know it's difficult for a child to talk to a parent who is moody and clingy (which is unreal o_0), but once you try, you know what to do. Find her weak points that caused her go overemotional over your decision (and even your actions and behaviours). Once you are certain and backed up with your reasonable reasons, go discuss nicely with your momma over the current situation. Politely and no gimmicks. Be as confident as possible, and if she shouts and screams, you gotta warn (please don't shout, say it in assertive tone) her not to scream, cuz that's not what a mother supposed to react to a child who has pure respect for his/her parents. Say comforting words to her that everything's gonna be alright, I'll call when I need help, I'll visit you during breaks after the college exams yadda yadda, to establish a more stronger family bond. Hopefully she will understand your feelings once thinking over, give her some space (but don't let her waste so much time). |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
on 2007-12-31 12:18:14 |
Parents can be annoying. But that proves that they love you. When you are getting old enough to leave you need to work together with them. It makes it harder on them when you try and leave all by yourself and not let them invole themsleves to help you. I think if you let them know what your plans are and what you are doing they wont bug you as much.  
"It's better to be used, then to be useless." |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
on 2008-01-12 21:33:30 |
I'd rather have a parent's love be too much than not enough. Parents can be overbearing, and annoying, frustrating, and exasperating. Most are also insecure. And all this is amplified when your the first or an only child because the parent is practically making the rules up as they go along. But I think that as long as they do love you and are trying to do what's best for you, then it can't be too much.  |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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I guess it is quite normal. Here in the Philippines, it is your responsibility to return the favor--that is, when they paid for your schooling and needs. But guess what: yours is a different case. Why would your mother hold you? Are they overprotective or just protecting you? Maybe they see something that may harm you in the future. Maybe they think you are vulnerable. Maybe they think that you will turn to a demented psycho when you step out of your doorstep. Maybe they think that the world is too big for you, and they need to attach a string to you so that they can just pull you out of a tight situation. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe communication is better. Talk. Think. React, if needed. Make her feel that you are strong and smart enough. Or, if not, feel free to stay at her arms. She maybe longing for you. TALK, okay? |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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on 2008-01-28 23:20:12 |
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for me parent's love is fine but I'm a grow up now,I know they care.. but I don't know there's alot of time I'm kinda tired of seeing them treat me like a baby. I just want to do what I want but it seem always got stop cause they suddenly yell or rant at me even tho its a small things.. and I keep hearing them say do this and not to do this and stuff everyday.. I just tend to ignored it even tho its getting into me and sometimes I just cry and do other stuff.. I don't really like arguing and talking back anymore, its just like not going to stop anywayz. And so yeah its like a daily problem thats keep happening over and over again, too much overprotective is tiring I would say. But even tho I'm glad they're there for me, just that I want to have my own freedom. |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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I'm so happy coz I dun live with my parents. I care about me too much~ and they are so supervene in all my business. they always wanna know what i'm doing, while i never wanna know what they're doing~ |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
on 2008-02-01 08:02:07 |
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sometimes, our parents get off their limits. if you want to settle this up, talk to her and tell her how you feel. ask for just a little of her time. make her understand that you are already old enough and responsible of all your actions. inform her how you feel; besides, you are her son. if she still persists and insists, then do whatever you like! well, not for a long period of time . . . just long enough to make her think of things and see your point. |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by bermudanwarrior
on 2008-02-01 08:39:45
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Heh. Everyone expresses their love/adoration in their own way. They sometimes can't realise how annoying they are. Or maybe they do, but keep on anyway, to show us how much they care for us. Guess you'll kinda understand them when you have children. |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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@ twisted yep,, that's right,, you will never know how it really works unless you become one,, |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
on 2008-12-22 23:24:53 |
| I agree, sometimes they're just so overprotective, like for example, my dad always wants me to accompany my little sister to her friends' parties, like, it makes me feel out of place there! Since she is a girl, my parents don't let her go out that much, and even prohibits her from bringing guy friends at home, but it's okay for me to bring anyone home, sice my parents are okay with me, I'm a boy, heehee, but really, I hate it when it's field trip time, neither me or my lil sis gets our parents' approval.. |
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Re: A Parent's Love... A Bit Too Much at Times?
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by
 
on 2008-12-23 13:03:08 |
I feel the same way. I may have just turned 18, but my grandparents have no faith in me at all. If I suggest I'm going somewhere all by myself, heaven forbid, they flip out. But I feel then loosening the lease a little bit, and slowly letting me venture out into the "big scary world." You have been really patient with you mom about her protectiveness, and telling you to wait longer for her to loosen the leash is pointless. If it were me, I'd just walk out [cruel I know]. I know that all parents should be revered, but there comes a point in a one's life where they have to assert themselves as being an adult.  |
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