|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by overlordsero
on 2007-03-09 18:24:18
|
|
0- D-ninja, LOLZ not sure but that is how life goes sometimes XD 0- Wolf, Things are not as black and white as they used to be, now its more of a gray spectrum. Sometimes life throws situations at you that force you to choose from a range from the lightest shade of gray to the darkest shade. basically the whole concept of picking the "lesser evil". I would have probably done the same thing if I was annoyed enough. Do stuff to me I could care less, do things to people I care about....watch out XD Granted I have never done that yet since I really havnt fallen into that type of situation. 0- Ayu, well not sure how to help the putting yourself down, however... I know how you feel in that part cause I do it as well. Im not sure exactly how often I do it but I know I do put myself down, or blame myself for something that frankly, I have no power over. What would maybe help is find something you absolutely LOVE to do to cheer you up or that helps calm you down if you ever feel that way. What I like to do is mainly play video games or photoshop ( I LOVE Photoshop XD) However right now I cant do either and I find myself a bit edgy cause it seems I cant vent anything. Though I do like to read manga, draw or write, so I have been doing those a little more and its helped a bit XD Just find something you love to do and just have at it XD 
|
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-15 18:08:45 |
|
Right now... I really....really feel guilty and depressed. As you all may know,I'm only 13...and yet....*sighs* Ok...well all this week I've been neglecting Gendou a bit. Because I found new friends to hang with.Once I meet a friend for one day,I seem to be devoted to them.Well,today my friend(we'll call her Y.) Y,asked me to come to teen center after school.So I went,all happy and smiley. Only,she ignored me..and I felt like I was following her like a puppy.. So...she was talking with her friends and said "So we're going to drink!" "We can't get drunk though our parents are going to pick us up!!" I wanted to say something...to yell to scream,or shout... I could've atleast gone with them,and supervised them...but I was afraid of being hated... I let them go,and at first I felt anger and then the guilt came.. I'm not a good friend...To top this all off,my old friend,has been ignoring me...  |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-15 18:12:01 |
|
So these new friends you met, are you somewhat, close to them at all? Also, why is the last friend you mentioned, ignoring you? How old are your friends anyways? They sound like they're in their late teenage years, or they're mid-teenagers who illegally drink. 
------- |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-15 18:19:33 |
|
~Even though I'm hardly close to them...I care alot about people I just meet. ~I don't know why my last friend has been ignoring me at all! I try to talk and she looks at me like I'm an alien. ~They're all my age... |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-15 18:23:13 |
|
They're all your age and they drink? Well, if I was you, I would've left them and went home. I wouldn't want to hang out with a bunch of under aged drinkers, and if they were ignoring me, I'd leave immediately. They were ignoring me so why would they care if I left or not? Why did you hang out with them for? It didn't sound like you had any fun or joyful expectations when you were meeting them or whatever.
------- |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-15 18:29:35 |
|
Yep.I did leave and go home,after they left. I don't know why I stayed with them.I guess it was just loneliness. Throughout half of this school year I have made only 1 friend and she ignores me. Then 'Y' comes along and Y seems like a typically nice person. She was nice to me and we talked in the cafeteria as if we were bestfriends. Yet,now,even though it was their decision...I feel guilty. |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-15 19:09:57 |
|
There is nothing to be guilty for here. I have a ton of friends who drinks, smokes, etc. but I don't hang out with them, with their drinking buddies, smoking buddies, etc. If they offer some to me, which they did before (but they were kidding), I simply told them "no" and walked away. It takes time to build certain bonds with friends. I have a ton of closer friends online then I see everyday in school. I have friends who I talk to, we're close, and we walk right by each other in the hallway. Now for you, there's no need to feel down, except for your one friend ignoring you. You need to confront her and figure out the problem because letting this go day by day, will soon create month after month, and even year after year, and that's just inexcusable. I'm not trying to sound too rough here, but you have to be tough at the same time when you're feeling a bit of depression.
------- |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-16 03:41:33 (edited 2007-03-16 03:45:20)
|
|
I really don't know how to approach her. It looks as if she hates or is really disgusted for some reason. You're not being rough at all.I've been trying and she either walks away or gives me an angry look.I'm confused as to what I did wrong.. The main reason I did feel guilty is,I would feel responsible if something horrible happened. |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by zparticus27
on 2007-03-16 03:48:16
|
|
hmmm friendship problems huh...well um first off all young lady...i think you should just leave Y fora while...not to sound like your father but she might be a bad influence...i dunno drinking at 13 is just plain stupid in my book...but like DA said it doesnt necessarily mean you should avoid them...just do what you think is right... and the only thing to really know your other friend's feeling isto confront her/him..just summon up the courage to do it...besides what could be worst than that? or do you want your friendship to end just like that? |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
  
on 2007-03-16 09:04:33 |
|
Hmm... Fren prob... Here lemme see if i can help abit... I've done alot of that at school... Yes i know im a crazy guy around here in Gendou, but believe me when i say... Im actually a serious guy when i need to be, and ive helped alot of people with their problems... Ok... Now that's straighted out... lets see... First of all i can see that your main problem is that you feel guilty, even though all of us here say that its not your fault... Now, im not gonna say the same stuffs you've read over again.. But instead, im gonna say that you're a good friend that really take cares of those around you... no wait... You're just a good person... No objections... So i guess that feeling of yours is normal... And as a person, you care how, the person you cared for, feels for you... So thats normal too... All you can do for her is just be there when she needs you most. For at the moment, she really looks like a bad influence... And frankly, i shall say that if you want to help, the process wont be too happy for you either... Its not gonna be easy. But if you really Really REALLY... Want to talk to her again.... The most obvious thing to clear the problem, is of course, find the reason you are avoided... Sometimes its not exactly what you THINK... She is like that because of a reason. And since you cant ask her directly, try talking to HER friend. Ask them y they think she might hate you... There are lots of reasons. And sometimes it could hurt. While others you cant do a thing about it...  Claimed |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-16 12:02:23 |
|
Well apparently I've been more naive than I thought...I just found out that most of the people I hang out with drink.I asked my friend 'G' an A+ student and she said,she found nothing wrong with it,and that I shouldn't tell a guidance counsellor.She said she's even done it and smoked...It's really ironic. Inferno: Well I didn't talk to her today,I only said Hi and she waved back,but she had a sad look on her face..I do want to help.But I also understand that if a person doesn't want to change I can't make them.I acted naive and asked where'd you go yesterday? She said 'Oh I went to T's place.' 'what'd you do there?' 'same old.' She lied to my face..I can't help a person who does that with no hesitation whatsoever...I can see she doesn't want to change. Zparticus: You don't sound like my dad at all,he'd yell at me XD And No I don't want it to end.She's a really good friend..lately she might be depressed,however,I still don't know why.My lack of social experience has prevented me from getting her number. |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-16 17:35:24 |
|
hey guys and girls(do i've to mention it?) sorry for not on9 for a long time.. i was busy wirh school and now,i'm totally not in the mood. i guess i have some problems? smk usj 8 stands for my school i dont know what was happening to myself. i just feel the same feeling..and i dont know how to describe it i just feel like i want to cry perhaps last night i was alone and the room was so dark. perhaps i was so worried about something perhaps i'm afraid about something that time,i just need someone to talk, need a shoulder to cry on my bestfriends told me that before but i dont want to be a burden to her. perhaps they were sleeping and they wont understand me. the worst feeling i had yesterday is the painful. i just want to shout to everyone that i dont want to live again i'm not that strong anymore i break my promise.. i'm not a person who stands for everything. i feel like i dont deserve to live in this world this feeling makes me want to commit suicide i dont know why i cried i dont know what is the main reason why i cried i just feel i want to cry and i've done that. today,this morning,this time,i feel the same thing. i dont know whether my smk usj 8 friends could help me or my old friends. they were busy and my smk usj 8 friends considered me as a girl who is happy-go-lucky. they dont know the real me. i lied again...i'm just.. not that strong anymore. i thnik i failed in everything i think i lose everyone that i have i'm lost in myself and i dont know what to do..it is so confusing.. i just feel sick~ and the worst feeling~ i tried to laugh but i cant~ and last night,i had the most terrible feelings ever..oh god |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-16 20:52:06 |
|
Esther-san: Don't take your life for granted. I've been through ALOT of bull.Even though I'm not that strong,I kept going. You might have depression,which is treated by pills,but I don't recommend. Have you been having any re-occuring dreams? I'm not a doctor and I can't diagnose it,but I might be able to help. Go to someone,get help.Just don't end it here.I'll help you whenever I can. Don't ever think of yourself as a burden...in doing so,you're belittling yourself. You're just a person that's sad.For one reason or the other. |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by zparticus27
on 2007-03-16 21:07:38 (edited 2007-03-17 01:15:36)
|
|
@esthar i think ive expierience something like that before...the feeling of lost, confusion,hatred,disillusion,reget,love and enticipation...mixed all into one...im guessing your confused as to whereyour going in life..i myself still suffer that feeling...yet i hardly show it to my family...heck i even feel that i dont even know myself that well... so how did i conquer that problem...well i really didnt...as days past the confused mixed feelings disappeared...yet at times i just want to shut everything up....i ended up going with the flow...not being able to be in control of things...and thats what i hate the most... the only way to calm my myself was to let everything out to HIM... through prayer i easily expressed my thoughts to God without any problems...even if i dont share my problems with others i know God hears them so i find it easier to talk to him... dang it instead of helping you i ended up tammering my own stupid problems gomen!hahaha i really dont know how to help ya...why dont you try to pray..helped be at times...anyway just hang in there... NEVER GIVE UP,NEVER SURRENDER! @ GC then you have to overcome those social problems to get in touch with your friend...besides we're all equal in a way..so there's no need to be shy...heck it beats losing a friend... |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-17 02:33:38 |
|
@GC: i tried to share it with one of my friend and the reuslt is,she didnt understand what i feel at all.i shared it with my ex(we still remain friends) and he understood what i feel but in the same time,he doesnt feel comfortable because his sister was there..and now,i dont know what to do.its too confusing..i dont know with who i suppose to share this.. @zparticus:i never show it to everyone..like u do but yesterday,i surrender.i called my ex(who is my best friend right now) and when he answered,i cried.i cried like a mad people.he kept quiet and he said what's wrong.after that,his voice sounds like uncomfortable and i hang.i know i could share with him but he's too blur.. this kind of feelings~..its too hard to describe by words.as zparticus said,all these feelings mixed all into one.. |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
|
|
I find that many people repress certain parts of themselves for reasons only they really understand. Maybe there is a part of you that you feel should not be seen by others or maybe you do not understand this part clearly enough to express anything at all. You are going to have to sit back and pick through all of the clutter in your head. It is that process whereby you discover who you really are and how you should express that to the world. We all have these perfected images of self that we feel as though we could never attain and that is because these images are falsehoods. They aren't what you want to be but rather what you think others want you to be. The more and more we find out about ourselves, the more and more we try to lock it away. Well it seems that it has come time for you to open up that little lockbox on your mind, body, and spirit. You must come to terms with yourself and you can only do that by looking inward to face oneself. It happens more often than not that, looking at who we really are, we find things that feel we should not let out. Like I mentioned above, sometimes it is because we do not understand and other times it is because we find it socially unacceptable to everyone around us. You must endeavor to understand why you have these tendencies. If you deem these parts of self still should not be expressed overtly, you should find a way for them to escape by other means. It could be sports, art, work, play, etc. But it should leave you feeling fulfilled at the end of it. For example, my out is running and acrobatics of a sort. There is nothing more serene than the flow of ones body in complete harmony with its surroundings. Try to find something that satisfies your very being. We all have to face our demons at some point in our lives. It is sad to say that they usually win but the more you endeavor to understand yourself, the more developed your understanding will become. Why do you think I post the things that I do on these forums? It is only so that I can understand myself by having an outside opinion. I have actually conquered quite a few things by the help from everyone here. But it is still up to you to take the first step, for help and for self-discovery. The task ahead may seem daunting but the rewards at the end are more than worth the effort. But sometimes you just gotta cry...even you really don't know the reasons why. Just know that everything works itself out in the end. All you need is time. |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-17 22:15:59 |
|
..i dont know when is the last time i cried.what i know is,i never cry after my ex dumped me.there are many things that hurts me until i wanna cry but i didnt do it.i didnt cry.i just keep it in my heart and i think by doing like that,all problems could solve.yes,i feel better by not telling anyone about my problem.i'd prefer to keep it in my heart.for exchange,i cried for two nights.i dont know why i cried.what i know is,i need to cry.i called my ex and i told him that i'm afraid.he calmed me down and he asked what are u afraid about? i'm afraid to through all these things.i feel like i'm not that strong anymore.i cant lied to anyone anymore.i'm afraid to lose someone that i really loved.i'm afraid to face the world if I lose someone.For a few years,I havent cry with my heart and yesterday,I cried again and again.what did i feel the most was the painful.i lost my teachers,my friends,my family members, and my own love. i change myself into a hypocrite person so that i can face to world bravely.they always see me laugh instead of crying and angry.i never show them the real me.almost every night i cried because they were hurt me including my parents.they dont show that they aprreciate me.once i do something good to them,they seem like to forget about me.when their friends are not beside them,they'll come to me.i feel like i've been used. i believe in karma but it doesnt acts like karma.how am i suppose to face the world with my own self?am i too nice to everyone?should i make some changes to myself?i mean,put a little devil in myself?i hate who i am yet i love who am i now.if i feel sad,i like to listen to broken wings and what goes around comes around song.it means so much to me. ... |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-18 11:54:56 |
|
Esther-san: If they didn't understand you,maybe you can convince your parents to go to a psycholigist,or go to a guidance counsellor. Or PM me sometimes. I';ve been told,I'm pretty easy to talk to,since I'm way understanding. Repressing your true emotions IS very bad...one day you're going to burst. Try releasing emotions through sports,poetry,keep a journal.Something that helps you release such emotions,otherwise,you'll crack. You also need to figure out why you're surpressing these emotions.You may love who you are on the outside,but that's a facade..Don't change yourself completely,or become the devil.You just have to get a bit assertive,but that's all. I feel your pain alot...My parents care about me,but they never pay attention to me as much as they should.When I get a good grade or something...they sign it and say nothing.But instead of living for pride,why not live for yourself? If they don't pay attention to you,why should you pay attention to them? Respect and Admirability is earned,not given. It's called getting taken advantage of,don't let it happen.You're being the accomadating person,and they do nothing to accomadate you. Is that fair? I don't think so.Be yourself,but at the sametime,know that most people do not want to hang out with people who don't like themselves! Work on your confidence a little,because,people say 'If that person doesn't like themselves,why should I like them?'. |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
 
on 2007-03-18 16:03:02 |
|
I don;t knoe how to feel right now... I have a friend...a guy friend who I have always considered my brother...Nii-chan I called him...and we have been like that for more than 7 years... Now he told me stuff today...he said that I betrayed him...That i have talked ill of him...I never did that...NEVER! It hurts me because he believed those things...and then he said that people talk bad of me too...and that they are close people ...and he didn't even tell me who those people were...making me feel even worse...I'm so sad... |
|
Re: The Depression Thread V4
Link |
by
on 2007-03-18 16:15:03 |
|
Pame: Being mean to you! =( How unforgivable.Especially someone so close to you! Maybe someone's spreading rumors and misleading him! He could just be seeking attention or diverting what he said as someone else's fault. I would talk to him,not in an angry tone but calmly. He might just believe you.Did you tell him you never did the things that he described! |