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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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well ケイ, merry christmas. i wish i could be there with you...then you would not feel alone. but i cant. just now that i am thinking about you and i hope everyone has a wonderful christmas  |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by Tasuki17502
on 2005-12-24 10:13:52 (edited 2005-12-24 10:14:47)
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Aw, *hugs ケイ* I wish I could be there with you. If it makes you feel any better, I have had to police come to my house on Christmas before. That was last year, and it was my father who had sent them. He wanted to take me away for the entire break for a trip to see his equally unpleasent family, and I didn't want to go. We never went on the trip, but because the custody agreement says I have to split my time off of school between parents I ended up being forced into my dads car to spend the rest of the break there. I hope he does not do it again this year. @nightmare, my current problem is on my xanga, and also here in the "looking for a bit of hope" thread. I also have a problem with not feeling loved. It doesn't help that my father treats me as baggage that he can show off for grades and polite manners. @Lady Rin, I feel very strongly for your friend Mu. She is definately on my thoughts. (I don't like to say "prayers".... I am not religious, so "on my thoughts" is more accurate) And please get some sleep. That seems to be a big probablem for people lately. I have been getting very little or no sleep, and if I recall correctly there are others here with little sleep as well. Today does not look to bad for me. My mom has invited my friend over, along with her mom and sister. She has a pretty dark past, and in short her life up till now has been like this. Her mom married a guy and had her, then they divorced and he later died. Her mom moved around a bit and found some other guy and ended up almost getting married to him, and had her sister. That guy was then arrested just before they were married for being a stalker. All the while they are moving about, and this is the first place they have had somewhat to their selves. They live in a run-down apartment, and they are not even sure if they will stay much longer. She has gone through so much, even living out of their small car. I feel glad that my mom and I can spend Christmas with them. They were going to treat the day as any other until we invited them to come look at Christmas lights in Washington DC. I don't know if it is selfish or not, but I don't want her to move anymore. I want her to stay here. But her mom is so unsure that they dont even have any real furniture. Not even beds. They all sleep on the floor, except for my friend Carly, who sleeps on a thin bed roll that my sister used to sleep on. It will be a different Christmas, but I liked Thanksgiving with them so I feel that today will be great. Happy Holidays Everyone! |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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well, it sounds like you have had a rough life...i hate to hear about parents that are seperated like that. say hello to your friend for me...if i had something to give her, i would. but i cannot...so tell her i am thinking about her this night. and that i hope that everything will be alright for her. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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...including the Phillipinos who like to chatter in Tagalog driving the rest of us around the twist. Forgive my presumptuousness, but are you getting annoyed by us liking our way of speaking in Filipino? @ Rin From the statement above, it's obvious that we are the only ones seen and pinpointed here. Why? There are Malays, Thais, even Japanese. But why Filipinos? That's bias! Why stereotype about us driving the rest of you around the twist, for a fact that you're the only one who goes to say that. You could've at least made a survey, that way it would be reasonable enough. And why must you give us the bad image (to Tasuki17502)? Have you ever known us? Have you ever spoken to us in Tagalog as well? We are trying our best to communicate using your language, and we are at our disadvantage (needless to say). Can you not be a little considerate? Some of us can barely speak in English, and because of that, we have to learn it all the way. It's not very easy, really. I myself am having difficulty trying to figure out if my grammar is correct or not, and it would already be a big thing for me if ever I commit an error, the simplest of it. Are yae doubting us? Please don't. Because I assure you that we are not talking out of ill-will with the rest of you guys. And never did we talk about stuff regarding you (do not be nosy; sometimes it is better to shut up while it's not always a good thing to know all the things that you want). Take it from me. If you want, I can translate every single Tagalog posts out there; I wouldn't mind anyhow. We don't just like speaking in Tagalog it, we LOVE it. And by the way, it's spelled Filipinos if you're talking about us; Philippines is our country. Philippinos is not a word. P.S.: Again, if I may have been rude... please excuse me. I just didn't like what you've said earlier. ***I can't believe that I've written something out of depression. I had to vent it out, but I didn't like it... It's already the 25th of December, 8:23 AM. Thank you very much, and Merry X-mas.*** |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by
on 2005-12-24 16:38:50 |
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Ummm...Merry Christmas everyone! Ummm...@Rukia, I'm glad you were able to vent your frustration. I'm very sure that Lady Rin did not mean to offend you at all, she seemed to be speaking as if we were all just a huge family full of our own little quirks, however I see what you mean and I hope your hopefully positive opinion of her or anybody here has not changed. BTW, what's Tagalog? |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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Our language. Actually, it's Filipino based in Tagalog. Try reading Pinoy-related threads, and you'll see. @ ROQ However, the point is.. she's labeling us, kind of introducing us to Tasuki17502 whom I believe is just new here in the thread (read the previous posts for that matter). I am still vexed, and I guess I'll have to chill the hell out. Ja-ne~ |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by
on 2005-12-24 17:02:02 |
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Oh thanks for the info, I'll check out the thread. I can understand the frustration, but you and I both have known Lady Rin for a while and not once has she ever seemed rude or offensive. I suppose it was wrong of her to post that, but please have mercy, I'm sure she didn't mean it, I would hate for the friendship of the thread to be broken apart by a single comment...I trust your judgement Rukia-san, please forgive her. I applaud your pride though, most people would have just let the offense slide without speaking up. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by S-a-c-h-i-e-l
on 2005-12-24 17:18:04
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lol, I can't even tell when Rin IS angry X_X... I don't see how people are getting annoyed by people talking in their own language, though... I see it and just think of it as another thread I don't really care for, not some obnoxious thing. Aww, Rin... On Christmas, too! T.T Well, maybe this Christmas will be remembered as "special" this year... ^_~ Hmmm.... ケイ, I would go to your house, but it's too far away for me T.T Dec. 24th, 6:18 PM! Time must hurry up, I wanna see what Jomunga got me ^_^ You guys are lucky, it's already Christmas over there... Of course, you waited the same langth of time as me, but still...  |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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tasuki, i feel for your friend, i know (by experience) its not easy to be moving around, it must be really hard for her. im glad that you are having a good christmas this year. rukia, i think i understand your frustruation, its not just that i understand it i know it, i know how it is, english is a hard language to learn, but i doubt that rin meant it to be rude, i think she meants it just as a lil joke. it doesnt seem that offensive to me, but then again im not a filipino, im a spich, a beaner(this is mostly for mexicans, but then again most people think that every one that speaks spanish is a mexican), a wetback (although i am here legaly, im a citizen for crying out fucking loud.), and so many other names they have out, but im used to it and i just simply dont care, im proud to be Hondureño, or as they call us here Hondurian. and i forgot what i was talking about. ケイ, im sorry that you have to spend christmas alone, but you could be stuck spending it with people you dont want to be around. dude, if you were anywere near where i am, i would go hang with you, but im stuck with family, and its not that i dontlove them, i just dont like them and they dont like me, so yeah. ladyrin, i was gonna say something about mu, but i forgot what it was. i know she is pissed, i dont blame her, who would. i got an hour of sleep last night, or should i say this morning. but i wont be able to go to sleep again till tomorrow night. last night was interesting, i walked out the house around 12:30 last night, last night i learnded that my uncle was coming to spend the night here, this is the guy who gets mad at me for being online, he says that i shoulg put the computer to good use, and all this other shit that i dont want to talk about cuz it would just piss me off. i dont know if i wrote about him here before or not. but anyways, it was 2 and he hadnt shown up so my mom went to sleep and since we already have poeple stay at our house (my moms friends been here for the past month of so, and she is driving both, me and my mom, insane, she is making me more crazy than i already am) i'm sleeping in the sofa, i was hungry so i went to get something to eat, when who decides to show up, my uncle, its 2:30. so i had to go wake up my mom and stuff, i tryed to avoid him the best i could cuz recently when he was here we ended up arguing all the time, and it was making my mom uneasy since she knew we both have a temper once they push certain botton, and we were pushing them. he had been around here for a while for that same reason, cuz we argued and i wouldnt back down. so this time he came i just avoided him to not give my mom an unpleasent time. and he left in the morning and came back her around 5 and left at 6, and its now 9 and im about to walk out again, its christmas eve, a night when i have to put on a big fake smile on my face and pretend im the happiest person it the whole fucking world, its the same shit every year. to me christmas is just another fucking day of the year. sorry for the language, but im a little stressed out, and i keep on fogetting what i was gonna post, damn my memory, i cant remember shit. kitsu saw a quote somewhere a while back and said it fitted me perfectly, it was something like im broke so i cant even pay attetion, or something along those lines. so im gonna spot now cuz i dont remember what i was gonna say anymore. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by
on 2005-12-24 19:07:08 |
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thanx for the thought everyone :-) hey maybe this year's christmas ain't so bad afterall <(^^,<) @tasuki,let's hope that didn't happen again this year.i would freak out if cops were to come to my house for christmas >.< @sachiel,dun worry sachiel,from what i can see at yer posted time,you have 12hrs less left for christmas^^ and before you even know it,it'll be christmas already~ well to everyone at gendou:メリイクリスマス~~ ps:i wonder how many times we've said merry christmas in this thread??? |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by Tasuki17502
on 2005-12-24 19:36:22
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Well, I am seriously dissapointed. My friend Carly couldn't end up getting here until 5, and we didn't really get to do anything of much fun. She left at 9, and two hours of that time was spent driving around to do her mom's work and having dinner. We had about 2 hours to actually chill, and all we did was watch anime. We were going to do more, but she had to leave so soon. We both had planned for more time than this because she was suppossed to arrive at 12. Nobody is online on AIM to talk to because they all have loving full families with brothers and sisters to spend time with. Not that my mom doesn't love me, but we are both depressed right now and she is too busy ranting to friends on the phone. So I am currently doing what my entire life has been lately, and that's sitting down and wishing that someone would call for me, or pop online so I can not feel so alone. I just sit on my bed and zone out into my little world of blank. I think I will go do that now. I hate being alone. @ケイ, Cops coming to my place is actually normal to me. It used to happen so often that it seemed almost logical to invite them to live in the guest bedroom. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by AnimeAngel27
on 2005-12-24 19:58:51
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It's Dec. 24th, and almost 11 pm. There doesn't seem to be any hope of sleeping for me tonight. I'm nervous about tomorrow. About christmas. It's not like I shouldn't be used to this kind of thing already, the family who all have sticks up their somewhat lavish and primmed asses. My parents aren't rich, we're somewhere in the middle. But the majority of my family is pretty well off and so they already look down on my mom for marrying my dad. And then to have the first child (a girl no less (me)) turn out to be "such a let down" and a "slacker" just makes things worse. I'm a compelte embarassment to the family and going to see all of them brings me near tears every year. I's love to be one of those people who love the holidays, but I'm not... I feel extremely depressed today and I don't even know what set it off either, I'm just really sad and I feel like crying. I hate this not knowing! I hate this feeling and I hate these stupid pills, I'm so sick of pills... I'm sorry, I'm ranting. Happy holidays everyone. Rin I'm sorry you and Mu had to go through something like that on such a time when things are supposed to be jolly and what not. I sincerely hope that Mu can over come this and become as strong as you and Ranger. I think just having you guys around though will really help. Anyone whose spending the holidays alone care to allow me to join them? I'd love to come visit one of you guys I really would. Ketsuki your Hondureno? That's awsome! I take spanish in school (languages are something I really enjoy learning and one of the few things I think I might actually be good at too) I'm in year 4 now. I'm also learning japanese on my own. Rukia, I don't think Lady Rin was being offensive with that comment. And I don't have a problem with the thread. I just wish I could speak/learn to speak the tagalog language... Welp I'll be around, cause there's no going to sleep tonight, maybe I'll pass out tomorrow during the dinner and I can escape their madness. (that'd probly only make things worse though for me. Then not only would I be a disappointment and a slacker, I'd be a waste of time and energy and a problem child too).
"Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have any film..." "Friends are the people who know everything about you and still put up with you!" "Nothing in life is free, even death costs us."
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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jusk got back from walking (it like a ritual now, i walk out the house just about everyday now) animeangel, you could come spend it with me, but we are kind of far away from each other,im from Honduras, a litle country in central america, i lived there until i was twelve and then i move to the US and learnded english. i want to learn japanesse, and other languages too, i think its awesome knowing different languge. im sorry about the family thing, but if it means anything, i think you are a great person, not a disappointment. keep taking your meds, they are supposed to be good for you, in my case they werent, so i stoped taking them. tasuki, whats your aim, maybe we can talk, mine is honduras1986. i feel more stupid then usual, all this time i been wonder about young kai, i havent heard from him in a long time, and i havent seem him online, i wonred how he is doing, if he is passing his classes, if he is getting along with his dad and his sister(i know for a fact that she does not like me). and all the time i been wondering i never thought to ask here. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by S-a-c-h-i-e-l
on 2005-12-24 21:11:16
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T.T Why does everyone see the bad side of Christmas...? Yeah, you guys have had bad lives, have evil parents, have unloving families, and I don't have any of that stuff. I feel kinda guilty... But instead of feeling bad that I have what others don't, I'm gonna be happy that I have it ^_^ Right now, I'm feeling very impatient... Christmas is 2 hours away, but I still need to sleep and stuff, so I'm gonna make this post as long as I can because I have nothing to do tonight. Mu has snapped, she's screaming at people on the phone and stuff... Rin, no matter how hard things get, you must not snap. Keep your cool, don't blow up, I know that that stuff can be very stressful. I feel bad for Mu... Tell Mu I say... Merry Christmas! Hope you can get through this mess!! Ketsuki, walking can be very stress-relieving. I used to go out and bike, but then my bike got stolen. And it got stolen again. And again. And my scooter got stolen. Twice. So after I spent my entire birthday and 3 months of allowance, I got a cool new bike with an awesome lock. After a few months though, I guess I forgot to lock it or locked it without spinning the combo or something, because it got stolen too >_< But now I have a very ugly bike that I got for $10 at D.I., and I covered it in duct tape. And I still need to make a duct tape basket on the back, too... No one's gonna steal this piece of garbage ^_^ ...And... Oh yeah, I was talking about Ketsuki's walking... Keep it up ^_^ I can't imagine being alone for Christmas. I would say some more, but I don't wanna make others feel bad... I have too much in my life. Tasuki, why do you have cops at your house so much? I almost never see them, and I'm glad about it ^_^ They're scary O_o /emote panics Ah-hah! ケイ said "Merii Kurisumasu~~"! I can tell, I have 1337 brain skills ^_^ |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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1337, thats alot of skills. 20 minutes till midnight. 20 minutes until i have to start pretending more then usual. grrrrr. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by S-a-c-h-i-e-l
on 2005-12-24 21:45:53
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1337 = LEET = elite. Yay~~ My friend just called me on Skype and asked if I was gonna play Starcraft... So I was like ^_^ I can help pass the time! I was gonna be bored all night... Skype owns ^_^ |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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lmfaoimback hahaha so uhmm i read the following and i .............
"Theroad to stupid is paved by good intentions" Mandy
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by AnimeAngel27
on 2005-12-24 22:00:33
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yep the pretending has already begun. Excitement huh ketsuki?! It's not that I don't like christmas and I do consider myself very lucky to spend it with someone, anyone I mean especially family. But when I'm around them I feel even more alone then I normally do. And today isn't a good day for me I've had a lot of unexplainable downs with my depression. (I had thought for a while that I had overcome it too, but man was I wrong, it came back to bite me in the butt ten times as strong as before.) And for some reason my meds aren't even helping right now so I just have a feeling things aren't going to go well tomorrow (or today, it's almost one am here) I wish I could keep as positive an attitude about it but I'm depressed (for no reason at all I think) and ranting... gonna stop now. I'm getting tired, must be the tranquilizer thing they give me for anxiety kicking in finally... well I'm gonna go now before I begin typing things that shouldn't be typed ( I tend to talk nonsense when I take these drugs) I'll try and stay positive, thanks guys! and Merry Xmas!
"Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have any film..." "Friends are the people who know everything about you and still put up with you!" "Nothing in life is free, even death costs us."
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by desertranger
on 2005-12-24 22:21:19
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Rin is sitting here very quiet and depressed and has been crying on and off all day long. She's wearing one of the nightgowns she wears or comfort hwhen she's really really upset about something. it's more than Mu's gettng busted this morning and she wont tell me. @Rukia and to the other Fillipinos, Rin says she's sorry and that she was only teasing you the way our friends tease us for speaking in spanish when english speaking people are about. Someone called Mu, Rin's friend, not quite, Mu is our younger daughter. this whole thing today has been a major pain in the ass for both of them are mucho angry and if I see martin I'm gonna haul his ass out back and skin em alive. Get my little girl arrested!!! I had to come up with $1000US to get her out of jail for charges that the cops told me would prob be dismissed since she was just riding and along because he wasn't man enough admit it and got Mu in busted too. Rin was totally shocked when she found out how much I/we had to lay out. There was something in the way she acted when I told her that makes me think something else is wrong I don't know about yet. The movie she was waching is over and I'm going put her to bed. she's to burned for anything else. Rin sends her love to everyone and wishes you all happy dreams tonight and merry christmas in the morning. Knowing Rin she would also like you to open your window before you go to bed tonight and wish upon a star and leave a place in your garden for fairies to dance. She doe that you know. Not every night but she does. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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its 12:12 here, merry christmas, the pretending has begun, and its gonna keep on going until everyone leaves the house or goes to sleep. like i said earlier, i love my family, i just dont like them. sachiel, i know what that meant, i was just messing around cuz i dont like the number thingy. alcoita, what? ok, im feeling shitty, again just like in every xmas. and kitsu is talking to me, very excitedly about how happy she is about her presents, and how this is a great time to be happy, and all that xmas bull shit. its not that i dont like xmas, i hate it. |