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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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| yeah loud places get me paranoid. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by night_link
on 2005-12-03 12:38:56
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| Especially that you get lost easily if you're not careful... |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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ahh! Most humble welcomes to my little corner of the net, Bumpsh3r, i welcome thee! to be honset, you sound alot like me, feeling alone and worthless...my parents make me feel like that all the time, so i know how much it hurts...but its ok, we hear can help greatly...tell us your troubles and we will help in any way we can! we are all a close family here, brothers and sisters that love and support each other. Rin, thats awsome! have fun! be careful! and did you still want to write my parrents a letter? yes, thank you for the complememt, i love my background...i think she is SO beautiful! and yes, the razor is a nice touch too. once again, Bumpsh3r, welcome to the family  |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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| hey Bumpsh3r, if you wanna stop being depressed remember or think of how things could have been worse,or if things are actually going bad. Staying depressed is so... so... so............... pointless, and if your not depressed your angry, i know how you feel. When i was about 6 years old(kotuso the 1st or the ferocious gust) i was all ways angry until I got 13. Of course i have no idea why i was always 24/7 angry when i was little but i think when i turned 13 i either came to my senses or just stopped caring,hence the gentle wind or kotuso the 2nd. I still have a lot of built of anger from many instances that happen now but i wash them out with T.V. and caffine. I still have very biased views of the world so if i offend anyone just let me know. The gentle aren't always the most cool headed, i still have angry tendencies but not all the time. Suppress it or go punch something, well okay maybe like a pillow or wall,not someone. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by night_link
on 2005-12-03 20:10:50 (edited 2005-12-03 20:11:56)
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Bumpsh3r, how old are you? You seem like you've lived long enough to experience all that... but then again everyone here has experienced similar parts that would make them depressed even though we're all different ages. This thread and its thread before have talked a lot about ways to deal with people's problem. One way is posting here. By the way, I noticed now. Welcome Bumpsh3r. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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well, i thought it would help, i really did...i figured, if they KNEW how i was, that it would help, things would get better....it appeares that i was sorly mistaken...the insults keep flying my way, they keep yelling at me and then not a minute later ask me to shovel the snow for them....and then they call me "selfish" because insted of shoveling the snow, i come in here and type this...even though after this i am going to shovel that snow on the drive...(and dad yelled at me for 10 minutes a few days ago just becuase i wanted to buy my PSP...which i HAD THE MONEY FOR!) the worst part is, im loosing my temper, ill explode for random reasons...stupid reasons...randomly, i just snapped my new quaterstalf in half...almost through my playstation agienst the wall because i lost a race in Burnout...i really dont like being like this...i am usually very calm, but im loosing my cool latly, as i said before, anger is detremental to me...i need to be calm in order to keep my sanity....i think after i shovel snow, im going to meditate or something. i hope i can fix this.... EDIT: me and my folks just had another talk, not a very assuring one...dad just cussed me out and quite litterally said "i dont give a **** about you anymore." allarently, one of the teachers sent dad my myspace, the entire site. and now he is all pissed at me...hes MAD at me because im depressed!?!? at liest mom loves me again, this i know...i alwayse considered dad as a good friend, someone that would alwasys be there when i needed him...he keeps saying that this is not normal...I DO NOT WANT TO BE NORMAL!!!I WANT TO BE ME!!! ive been me for a while, and i love it!!!! i HATE normal! |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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| @nightmare you sound a lot like me when i was 6-13(just read the post below Young Kai's) i was angry all the time. I broke countless stuff and injured countless people while i was mad. It also sounds like your dad has an anger management problem as well. I think i just gave up being angry,forgot,or something but i can tell your situation is a little more dire. Just do everything he ask of you to warm him up a little and then maybe you can start doing small things that you want to do and eventually move up. I don't know how my parents handled me when i was angry all the time so try to understand that maybe your dad is a little frusterated. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by
on 2005-12-04 17:56:46 |
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Jomunga I assume your question means why we got married at Disneyworld instead of Disneyland. Yes, D-land is closer to where we live. However I was living in England at the time we met and when we got married. Disney parks have a speciual meaning to me, especially the one in Florida. We were married at a time in my life when everything was falling apart. Ranger had proposed and I had accepted. When I told my parents my father disowned me, threw me out. He didn;t even tell me personally he sent me a letter delivered by my brother. I wasn't even allowed to return home to pack my things, they were sent to me. Ranger put me back together telling me I would never have to worrty about anything like that again and we were married at the end opf the month, April 27, 1983 with a wedding I never expected. He hnad his friends put it together and since I loved faeries and faerie tales he made sure I had a faerie tale wedding. This trip was a major pain from the word go. We had a lot of fun only getting there turned out to be a problem. I have never seen Disneyland as crowded as it was yesterday. You coldn't move and that's a problem for Ranger who doesn't like crowds or too much noise. I only went on one major ride, Space Mountain and spent over an hour waiting to get on. We did ride the monorail and took the train ride around the park, the carousel and storybook land. We also saw the christmas parade only we didn't stay for the fireworks. Ranger's hip started to bother him, it's amazing we stayed as late as we did only it was too much for him so we took the shuttle back to the airport and I flew home. That's when I found out I had to fly home. That was my first ever unsupervised night landing kind of scary certainly more exciting that space mountain. I did do some shopping and Ranger now has 4 new Tinkerbell T-shirts he can wear. Someone said they were 15 and didn't want to go anymore, others have also said something similar. It is a wonderful place toi have fun we did despite our problems yesterday. I went to be happy and feeling very good abotu the day and myself. that's what Disneyland can do. I know it's expensive, even when you don't have to by admission still it is a wonderful adventure. Nightmare, if ytou would like me too cf course. Give me an idea what you want me to say and I shall try to write one for you. You can email me that information and I shall let you read it before I send it to you or them and you can decide what to do.  |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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| i crowds and noises all of the put together is a sign for trouble. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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Wow, thank you for all your replies, and since so many asked here is more depth to my problems. Get ready for a long story. I will try to keep it as short as I can. For starters let me say I am 27 yrs. old. My mother is on her 4th husband with my father. She is still with him to this day, in SPITE of the fact that he molested, yes MOLESTED one of my sisters. Who, in turn, suffered through much mental health counseling as a result and hasn't really amounted to much. She was a stripper for a long time at Mons Venus if anyone knows what that is. My mother's side of the family (her mother, 1 brother, and a step son who also molested my other sister) Suffers(ed) from "mental illness" and none of which are any longer alive. The step-son killed himself, the brother mysteriously disappeared and was found dead under a bridge (but no evidence of fowl play was discovered...hmm), and her mother has since passed on. I use the quotes becuase from what I can tell it's not mental illness, their issues are/were a direct result of how they were treated by their parents etc. and appears to me nothing more than low self esteem. They are happy to be talked down to, and to have their lives run by someone else and this is what they've tried to instill in me, by treating me in such a way. Someone asked what do I see when I look at them? I see decrepped (not sure if that's correct spelling) people, with no will or spirit for life. They only care to do what they have to do to get by (which incidently includes trying to kill my spirit and zest for life). I started noticing this stuff at about the age of 18, but since have realized they were trying to do this my while life (mostly by adding 2 + 2). I directly confirmed this by inquiring about key times which back then I remember as being strange but never gave it a second thought (simply because innocense proves ignorance, and of course no one in this world was cruel or would do mean things like that). The reaction I got said everything. It was more or less an astounded nervous reaction"wow he's smart, I can't believe he remembers that, and oops can't put that over on him" reaction. Not to mention everytime I prove them wrong in an argument, they look for another way to try and come at me. Get this, my 6'2" 230lbs brother (not fat), told me I was a whiner 1 night. I stood up and said, "I'm a whiner because I have the balls to get up and say what no one else will?" he felt the need to stand up and punch, yes punch his 5'9" 150lbs brother. I think he did it because deep down he knew I was right and couldn't handle the blow to his own self-esteem that I'm sure was dealt (unintentionally). Mind you, I don't know what his thought process was, I can't read his mind, that's my best guess but I'd be willing to bet it's correct. He is a very greedy, arrogant, and conceited person. His sons know it, the mother of his sons (whom he never married because he cheated on her while they were together) knows it, and I know it. So at any rate, this whole cloud follows me wherever I go, whatever I do. I moved away from here to Indiana to leave and was never planning on talking to any of this family again. I also made it very clear that I wanted nothing to do with them. However, they made every effort they could to track me down (which was confirmed when I cam back) and my life was still miserable in Indiana. I am yet since back living at "home" with no job, becuase I will not accept a position which I am less qualified for and shouldn't have to because there are plenty positions in my field. This I know, I've looked at market trends, I watch the news, and I read articles daily. So please, you tell me what's going on here. All I want is the job that I am appropriately qualified for and that I've busted my tail working, learning, and striving for over the last 5 yrs so I can finally leave this hellhole along with everyone in it behind. This is not a family, and anyone that claims it to be is seriously warped. Also, let me say, I'm not trying to play the part of the innocent, perfect person that has never done anything wrong or does not have any instability problems of their own. I'm not perfect, I have a good head on my shoulders, I am generally very level headed, I do learn from my mistakes, and I do try to live an honorable life. I don't give in like they do and allow someone to rule me and I never will. I feel because of that I am never going to get to live my life though. Or by the time I do I'm going to be too old to. This is long enough for now. I was originally going to do replies to everyone that replied to me but since I've already made this so long I will only say thank you for now. So thank you all for your support. - Regards |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by S-a-c-h-i-e-l
on 2005-12-05 00:49:11
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Well, it's a family by literal terms. Otherwise, you got a mess that's supposed to be a horrible, if you're lucky, then bad family. Nightmare, I'm going through something similar to that right now, although not so severe. Like if I die in FFXI, I wanna give up, but I don't. I'm almost a level up, I've been on level 6 for a day or two... I'm almost there, so I won't give up ^_^ And yes, be yourself. If it's you that you wanna be, then be you. Just remember to be open-minded and change yourself if it's better to change ^_^ If I were you, bumbsh3r, I'd get a any job that was availabe, move, then get your good job. Anything is better than what you have now, I think. A 59 or something like that year old guy wearing Tinkerbell T-shirts?? How funny... Think that's all...  |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by
on 2005-12-05 07:19:14 |
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He wears them for a variety of reasons. All of them valid. That's what I buy. He doesn't care what other people think. He is very comfortable with himself. If someone gives him a problem about it he always has a couple of answers. Gay person: Ooohh!!! I love your shirt. Ranger, politely: "I'm sorry, but it's Miss Bells sweet ass I'm after, not yours". Tough guy: Hey look at that.... followed by something inappropriate. Ranger with menace, and he does this very well: "I'm not Peter Pan I'm Capt Fn Hook". then he takes a hard step toward them. They usually back down. In general it's not a problem except for me when we go to the pub and there are women there who think it's attractive and he's single. Woman/girl: "I like your T-shirt it's cute." Me, walking up and waving my wedding band: "May I remind you how jealous Tinkerbell is"? For the record Ranger wears no jewelery at all for safety reasons including our wedding band. He does wear it on a platinum chain around his neck. Maybe I should post some of my own Tink drawings. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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KILL, whoops that slipped. But seriously I would like too right now. Bumpsh3r sit down with your sisters, and ONLY your sisters. And talk to them about EVERYTHING, ask them if they regret ending up like they are. Get them to reflect. Make it so they want to change their lives. Talk to them until they want to escape. Then do this, plan to move again. Offer to take your sisters with you, share an apartment and work towards something better. Help eachother out. Even if you don't like your sisters or they turned into sluts, pity them, you can't blame them. Plus if you help them out, they might just be their when you need them the most. Don't insist they have to go with you, only show them a new path and give them the choice. You are 27, your parents have no hold on you. If they start shit, tell your story to the judge, and you can get a retraining order, especially if your sisters are with you. Get your new life, and always be on the look out for you and whomever is you. I suggest looking for a good girlfriend before you get to old while you are at it. And be the good lover/friend/father/brother you've always wanted. If anyone else likes this suggestion feel free to add, I know there is more I can say. If you want any more advice feel free to ask, it gives me pleasure to give advice so don't hesitate. I've always wanted the GAO GAO STEGOSAURUS shirt from Air, I don't like wearing shirts that simply advertise anime. I like the shirts that they wear in the anime, and when you pass by everyone, only the ones who have seen the anime would know where the shirt is from.  Jomunga eats your avatars. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by S-a-c-h-i-e-l
on 2005-12-05 16:10:52
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Gao! Nihaha, says pikopiko! I love Air... I'd want to get the clothes Inu Yasha wears ^_^ |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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wow, i dont really know what to say...im sorry guys, im kinda tired... |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by
on 2005-12-05 19:12:44 |
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i love air too. I would also like to have Misuzu's clothes. I found it a very beautiful and loving story. I'm not going to say anything else since it would be a spoiler. Gao!!! Nightmare, get some sleep. You don't have to post everynight. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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How about the pajamas from Pita Ten. Those have got to take the cake. How nuts whould it be to sleep in those pajamas. Jomunga eats your avatars. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by
on 2005-12-06 05:48:50 (edited 2005-12-06 05:49:02)
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Can you post a picture, I don't know what they look like. I like fantasy and anime clothes. I even have several outfits I put together that are very anime and I can wear them anywhere. I have three seifuku and two other school uniforms I can wear to work, pleated skirts, Kaname Chidorie's walking shoes and several of Miss Kazemes outfits. Ieven dress like Yuklari does. Do I need to tell you what series they are from? |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by
on 2005-12-06 06:07:30 (edited 2005-12-06 06:10:36)
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hmm...full metal panic? yea,i reallly like misuzu's t-shirt >.< i look around the web to see if there's such a t-shirt and shure enuff,here it is^^ Gao Gao T-shirt argh!!i dun have any credit card or cash left in my paypal account(T.T) |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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i've neva experienced any of the forummer's account, but after some incidents, i truly understand that suicide cases are soarin high at staggerin numbers. i'd like to compliment the author of this thread for his/her effort on whatever his/her noble purpose right now. ever heard this saying, "One man has a lot of stories to tell, but there's just no listener"? those who're depressed actually need somebody to listen to their real problems. when no one wanna listen includin your parents, friends or teachers, u might consider suicide or somethin stupid. just lending your shoulder to cry on for ur friends & listening to their problems won't cost a cent, in fact u might save a life.  |