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Does looks really matter? (when it comes to love)
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by Liesianthes
on 2010-12-23 23:38:13
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answer honestly.... *only the truth *answer who u really are *cite examples *proof in ur answer (optional) the reason why i asked this bcoz.. i'm in a relationship right now(a Long Distance one). 1 yr and 3 wks... and just 2 wks b4 she met a guy that is a good looking (looks like korean guy) and nice.. (she even hide it to me, good thing the msg. for that guy was sent to me...so i found out) back on the story after that, each day i can feel that she is slowly fading away, she text when she likes it.. and never reply for almost an hour or two.. unlike before.. not to mention it's vacation right now.. Me: ugly + nice (plus abnormal eyes.. Guy: nice + good looking... that's it.. it's the truth that i find it hard to accept....
that's all height="50"
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Re: Does looks really matter? (when it comes to love)
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by
on 2010-12-24 04:02:08 |
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The thing is, everyone says that looks don't count and that if you love someone that should be that, however, you need to be attracted to them physically too. What you both have done is look at each others personality, and it seems she has been attracted to that, but what comes after is unfortunately looks. Now i am not saying she could dislike your looks, but there is a possibility, or she could just be bored of the relationship.. what it seems like she's doing is she either wants time apart for a while, she wants space, or she is distancing herself from you so you break up with her, or its not so hard for you to take if she does break up with you. I suggest you sit down and have a long talk with her about it, it might be your last chance L
Thank you PG :3
thank you tifa :3 
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Re: Does looks really matter? (when it comes to love)
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by
on 2010-12-24 06:33:31 |
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Umm, I think it's more of the long distance ingredient here that might be the problem. Honestly, I think online relationships rarely work unless there's a good chance of meeting the partner in the future. Going out with someone for like, 3 years online and then it just breaks as if the relationship was only 3 weeks long, is believable as can be. I mean, I'm obviously talking about my personal opinion, but I'm not gonna date a girl online (at all) and found out there's no chance in the long run even. Whether or not if "looks matter" is the question here, in your situation, I think it's more of where's who. 
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Re: Does looks really matter? (when it comes to love)
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by
on 2010-12-24 07:53:50 |
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Well, looks aren't everything, especially when it comes to a long distance relationship. There is some physical attraction in all love, that's true. Even Shakespeare wrote about that in his works. I know I wouldn't date anyone if I thought they were really ugly, but it also depends on the guy's personality too. Being a bit more descriptive than nice would give us a better idea of both you and this guy personality-wise. Nice could mean many things, like honest, or funny, or understanding, or caring. She might like this guy because he's funny and understanding, but she might like you more because you're funny, understanding and caring. And vice versa, she might find this guy better than you personality wise too, it all depends on what this girl looks for and wants in a guy. If she is going out with you, then she must have found something that she liked in you. Going a year in a relationship is a hard thing, more so in a long distance relationship. If you've been with this girl for about a year and she suddenly finds this guy better than you, then that just means that she isn't really devoted to you, or she just doesn't like you the way she used to (Or both). Like what L said, she's probably bored of the relationship now if she's taking an interest in another guy. If you feel as though you're competing for her love with this guy now, then you definitely should talk to her about it and tell her how you feel. And like what DA said, the long distance part of it all might be a problem as well. Does the girl stand a better chance of seeing this guy in real life than seeing you? The goal of online relationships is to be with the partner in real life too, right? So think about it that way as well, if this girl stands a better chance of seeing this guy in real life than she does with you. Also, think if there's anything that you could have in the past two weeks to make her distance for herself from you. She might be distancing yourself from you to prepare for breaking up with you, or she might be distancing herself because of something you might have done or by the way you've been acting. Again, you should really just talk to her and tell her how you feel.  |
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Re: Does looks really matter? (when it comes to love)
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by
on 2010-12-24 18:42:43 (edited 2010-12-24 19:42:27)
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If you were to be extremely black/white about it. Yes. It's tough, but it's pretty much how lots of people work. Although, there's also many things that could change everything. One could be that people have different standards, so they might have a whole different concept of attractive than others. Another, and also a very big one, would be "love". It's common for people to fall in love with a person and end up always seeing them as the most attractive guy/girl ever, regardless of what other people really think. To be honest, I personally think looks do matter. The first thing I would think would be that the person actually put the effort into making themselves presentable. It makes a first impression. This is the same with many other situations outside love as well. Dress to impress. For your situation, I really don't think the looks has much to do with it. It's more liekly to be about the long-distance part of it like most people have said above. It might be because people enjoy having people closer to them that they can easily interact with. Also, classifying yourself as ugly is harsh. Nobody should do that unless they really hate themselves to the core. =/ Everybody has room for improvement.  |
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Re: Does looks really matter? (when it comes to love)
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I gotta go with DA on this one. I think the long distance is killing this one. Especially if you haven't ever met in real life. To me, experiences matter most in a relationship. I've gone after the cute ones and the smart ones and the wild ones. It's the moments we share together that truly define our "relationship" with that person. Whether it is as simple as "Woah, I remember just the way she moves in that dress" all the way to a deep conversation you shared about life, death, and everything. However, someone we're attracted to will usually generate more of these moments every time you come into contact with them whereas an online relationship is generated by the quality of your personality. Easier but not more important. I tend to think you fall in love before you really know it for sure. It's just those right mix of memories; the things you never really forget. Who knows? I'm going to continue sipping on my scotch and ponder why holidays only remind me that I still haven't gotten it right yet. To search, to settle, to stumble, to sever and hopefully fall. We are quite fickle. |
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Re: Does looks really matter? (when it comes to love)
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She doesn't see you in real life so looks don't particularly matter. More likely, she's spending her time on a real life relationship and not wasting her time on a man she hasn't met. |
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Re: Does looks really matter? (when it comes to love)
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by Liesianthes
on 2011-01-16 01:45:34
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@dickyarmstrong the last line of your post hits me... maybe your right with that...
that's all height="50"
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