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Is polygamy wrong?
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I know for many people this is a deffinet yes, but for me it is a very confusing issue. For those who don't know, polygamy is when one man take multiple wives or one women takes multiple husbands, one man taking multiple wives is more common by far. Whether it be despit or because of the argument that polygamy undermines women, it is mainly the women that defend polygamy, my guess is that no one wants to hear a man brag about having multiple wives. The women often argue that their husband having other wives gives them more freedom than traditional marriages. I'm just not sure what to think of the topic. On one hand, I don't want to say something is wrong because i can think of circumstances where the choice can be understandable. On the other hand, as long as there are singles of both sexes honestly looking for love, it is only fair and proper for there to be faithful marrages between just two people. My main question is what happens with the multiple wives if the husban dies? As far as how I feel currently, there are some reasons for choosing polygamy that disgust me. First is sex, the idea of a man marrying multiple women for the sake of sex disgust me far more than anything else, it degrades women and the human race as a whole. I don't think sex should be the reason to enter any marriage, let alone poygamy. Second is conveiniance, marriage is supposed to be a comitment, getting into a relationship with multiple partners just to shirk on responsabilities forced on those in traditional marriages is wrong. Finnaly is fear, it may seem reasonable to get into a relations ship with someone who has proven his abuility to care for and/or respect others in the face of the possibuility of an abusive, unloyal, or just plain unattractive partner but it should not be the reason to enter a relationship. There is only one reason to enter a marriage of any kind, and that is love. I know some of you are thinking that it is impossible to love someone and yet be unable to be faithful to them alone, but I don't think that's true. What happens when someone marries someone they truely love but that person dies? Are they unable to truely love anyone else? If a person can honestly fall in love twice, who is to say it can not happen at the same time? I do think that people should pick a single partner, but there are conditions that have to be meet before I would accept polygamy. First is equal love, being able to choose between the partners has to be unimmagineable to where they would rather lose both than pick one, even to the extent of death. Second is will, simply meaning noone can be foreced or even baited into the relationship. Third is mutual obligation, the same sex members of the marriage have to be marrying each other just as much as they are marrying the oposite sex partner and their responsabuilities to eachother continue even in the even the oposite sex partner dies. (No this does not mean the same sex partners have to be Bi, although that would be hilarious.)Finnaly is the oposite sex member has to be able to protect their partners, if the person does not have the will to do everything in their power to help every last one of their partners even in a worst case senario, they have no right to have them. That is what I have to say about it, but I would like to hear others. Thoughts, opinions, comments, I would like to hear them all. REMEMBER, NOT RIGHT AND WRONG ARE DIFFERENT. |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by Devourer-Of-Tomatoes
on 2009-08-31 22:34:44
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You should know that this issue that you brought could lead to some serious religion debate in here. I don't mind discussing this, but I'm afraid others not think the same as I am. Fyi, muslim believe that poligamy (man with multiple wives, max - 4 wives only) is not wrong at all, as long as the husband have the ability to be fair to both or more of his wives, physically and economically. This includes house, which means if the first wife lives in a house, the second wife must live in another house that have almost equal value to the first. Oh yeah, the first and second aren't allow to live together as well. That's the rule. There's plenty more rules about marriages especially poligamy in Islam that a man must understand and follow if he want to have a second wife. The rule includes economy support for each wives, their children, special cases, and even death cases. That's why back in my country, (Malaysia) most men doesn't marry more than one, because the cost to have another wife is too high. |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by
 
on 2009-09-01 06:38:29 (edited 2009-09-01 06:38:44)
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Well, i don't agree with polygamy... BEcause, of course it will hurt your significant other, because that means you don't love him/her fully... You yourself don't want to be hurt, right?? Besides, i think it's a very selfish thing to do... =/   |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by
 
on 2009-09-01 09:50:22 (edited 2009-09-01 09:51:22)
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What I know about marriage, is a materialistic contract. Even it's about love, it's actually about sharing and contributing wealth of spouses together in the family. Polygamy doesn't mean it's wrong, when it exists, sure it brought some positive benefit, ie a husband marrying a poor woman to contribute wealth for her and her family, under certain terms and conditions. I guess the obvious wrong is that a husband/wife married many wives/husbands because he/she 'loves' them. No serious indications that he/she determines to provide food, money and shelter and emotional needs to the spouses. Polygamy is misused. |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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I'm 50/50 on this...it's ok depending on religion, etc. Me, personally I couldn't care, as long as you love said party.  |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by chaosvegeta666
on 2009-09-01 19:28:06
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@zero: not completely true. if bought partners agreed with polygamy then neither would be hurt.* @NIN: i agree that it is mainly misused.* @Neko: thats a religous program.* @Naru: 100% agree.* *@ALL: if you DO TRUELY "LOVE" all the wives/husbands then there really isnt a prblem (i think). marriage, i think, should be about love. anyone that brings "it's about religion." up needs to REALLY think about it with an OPEN mind. i think if it is "TRUE LOVE" then it should be find. 
darkness is the vail that holds the truth. open your eyes and let the true world be seen, if you dare think you can handle it. i am the darkness within your heart. i know what you fear, and what you really are.
--Myself-- --> |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by Devourer-Of-Tomatoes
on 2009-09-01 22:08:45 (edited 2009-09-01 22:13:38)
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Nin do have point there, nowadays poligamy mainly misused. There are cases where a man secretly married another women. I agree that it is not the right thing to do. Man should consider his wife's feeling first before getting another wife. It would be better if the man have a good reason for getting a second wife. Problem such as the wife are impossible to have child, (no matter how advance nowadays technology, this problem still exist... I hope I'm not one of the unlucky girl who have this problem...) what should the couple do? Live the rest of the life without any child? (a nightmare to me...) The alternative is to get another wife, or getting adopted child. If somehow the country banned poligamy, that means the man HAVE TO divorce his first wife, before he could marry another women. If that happen what will become to the ex-wife? Other option that I mention about is to get an adopted child. You should realize how complicated the process is. It could take months before the couple know the result. If it was a success, there shouldn't be a problem. What if they failed? They have to go through all the nonsense paperwork all over again and wait for months to get another result. Depending on situation, poligamy can be right and it can be wrong. It's quite similar to having a knife on your hand. If you use it to cut onions, tomatoes, for cooking, there is nothing wrong with it. But if you use the knife to cut people ears, tongue, that's completely wrong. By the way, I don't think marriage is all about 'love'. Love alone will not bring happiness in marriage. It should come together with responsiblity, respect each other and able to tolerate with each other. |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by andori-kun
on 2009-09-02 22:50:23
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Bluntly speaking, I agree with the polygamy. Although, I don't have any intention to carry it out. Because, it can only be done successfully by very wise men.  |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by SomeFatMan
on 2009-09-10 16:20:01
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| The main reason people find polygamy so strange is because they believe in only having one true love. There is nothing wrong with loving more than one person, as long as all parties agree. The horrible part of some polygamist groups is that they force girls into it with no real consent and use indoctrination to keep them oppresed. Everyone here has to remember that the human population is descended from twice as many women as men, which means that somwhere along the way one man had more than one wife. |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by SomeFatMan
on 2009-09-13 19:34:31
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| Actually, not all Mormons support polygamy. There are some who are against polygamy, especially because many groups of Mormans who practice it are the groups who force young girls into it. |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by chaosvegeta666
on 2009-09-13 19:52:42
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@SomeFatMan: a~h, good point. but again it all leads back to personal view as stated before. i dont know if i can say "it wrong", because of whats wrong, or doesnt work for someone maybe not be with another.
darkness is the vail that holds the truth. open your eyes and let the true world be seen, if you dare think you can handle it. i am the darkness within your heart. i know what you fear, and what you really are.
--Myself-- --> |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by
on 2009-11-29 19:07:05 |
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oh wow...this forum...lets see I'll just say it and I'm not asking ya understand I just want a honest opinion (if that's how it's spelled) well this is in "My Point of View" polygamy is only "good" when couples have a unbreakable bond to a point where they can all fully understand what they have to do to, fulfill the Requirements "however they want to err...don't know what the word I'm looking for "stay together,agree with the terms,etc? @_@ ) and knowing what will happen if this is what couples wanted and..eerr.. this is somewhat i see if polygamy is accepted "Only if this is what they wanted" cus polygamy these days is WRONG!!! If being Abuse by crazy people who just desires for more husbands for wives >_< and want them only for their own personally gain 
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by
on 2009-12-02 02:50:22 |
it wouldn't be wrong. i mean, there's no real meaning of love anyway, so having polygamy is a possibility. the way i see it, if they are willing to share and they are willing to work together, it would be fine.  |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by
on 2009-12-02 04:16:05 |
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they say it would depend what u're religion is.. here in our place, Muslims are allowed to have as many wives as they could as long as they could support all of their needs.. but for christians, it is certainly not allowed by any means.. but my real view of this is really wrong,, i believe that there's someone meant for u somewhere and that person is only one.. i think they just have the polygamy because they're never contented of only one person.. they should learn to control themself for having mistresses and the like is bad for a child like me.. it makes me cry whenever i think circumstances like this.. please for those affected don't be offended beacuse this is only my point of view.. thanks  |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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who said wrong? 1 : 4 (islamic perspective) we do this for sillaturahim, not for "sex"
é’ã„æ–‡å¦
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by
on 2010-03-07 20:27:33 |
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@Shae I guess you have your share of experience must be rough ;_; Anyone else that was in the same situation, seen it, or know anyone that had this?
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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| Moral and ethical issues usually come with my generic answer. Sh*t, whatever makes you happy. It isn't up to anyone but yourself to decide what is right or wrong. If you can sway enough minds then marrying a coffee cup could become acceptable. We have polygamy in America too; we just call it alimony. |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by
on 2010-04-28 20:59:18 |
I agree with Wolf. Haha!! sometimes polygamy is needed in most ethnic groups in order to live so go figure. 
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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I Agree with Polygamy because: POLYGAMY IS NEEDED IN NEAR FUTURE. even without religion Issue polygamy is natural for human being. ancient people usually polygamist. its natural for man to love more than one women. nowadays women large in number and man less. if polygamy forbidden then who will married them. I think every women has their right to marry someone they love. |
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Re: Is polygamy wrong?
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by
 
on 2010-07-10 06:37:10 |
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If you want to do polygamy, go ahead... nobody have a right to do, or don't polygamy whoever do sex, thats only for their own lust.    |
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