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I need advise (update)
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by
on 2007-04-23 09:01:40 (edited 2007-04-23 09:02:50)
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Mythman here. Alright. This is an update on my current circumstance. I took the majority's advice and waited it out. Now,with absolutly no help or intervention for me, they've broken up. But, they've only recently broken up so I'm not sure if I should just charge right in or if I should wait a little while before I take my stand? And when I do try to enter her life in this way, should I take it slow or should I just get it over with? I'm so confused and lost. Peace! 
(The lone fox that stands against the wolves.) |
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Re: I need advise (update)
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well, that depends. do you want to be the 'rebound'? if she's heartbroken because of their break-up, you have to give her time to 'heal' first. but if she isn't, go ahead! ^___^v i say, you don't have to take it slow, you don't have to tell it directly either. you can just give hints that you like her and you want something more, and then when you have enough courage to say it, go right up to her and say it. :3 err... i'm no expert in these kind of things anyway. so you don't have to take my advice. =______=v not trying to be johnny the rain cloud here.. but: if the reason of the break-up isn't that serious, there's a possibility that they'll go back together again.. what now? o.o 
*insert epic picture here* |
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Re: I need advise (update)
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by
 
on 2007-04-23 09:59:31 |
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^ i think if she's heartbroken,~ you should be there for her and comfort her <-- be a TRUE-TO-HEART-FRiEND ;) i don't think you should RiGHT AWAY confess NOW~ give it some time, don't just barge in ahead just because she's single now ++ yehp, if it's not that serious of a break-up, they could get back together XP    m y . L i F E . i . t r a d e . i n . f o r . y o u r . P A i N . |
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Re: I need advise (update)
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by
on 2007-04-23 10:23:01 (edited 2007-04-23 10:25:45)
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Giving it some time would be preferable. Comfort her and let her know you'll be there for her in any manner through thick and thin. That's the best you can give her. THAT is what showing love is all about. You DON'T have to say "I love you" in order to express it, though everyone now-a-days seems to only fall in love due to the other saying it. IF you truly love that person, let make an impression that you love her, not by words, but by action. It is hard to see signs of a person's love, but trust me, it is there. I remember a story. Now this starts at 8th grade, mind you, so this is true patience. This guy, he writes letters to her, telling her how he'll be there no matter what, just for her. And he was. every time something hard or harsh came in that girl's path, he would come up and ask, "Need some company?" or "something wrong?" just to break the ice and to just help her along. This continued until highschool. By that time, the girl was in many relationships and was broken down. 9 years after graduation of highschool and college, she was alone. Sure she had friends that she called every once in a while, but she felt that she had no one to look up to as a friend and as a lover. Every boy she met was a slob in his own way, only going out with her to gain popularity or brag about being her boyfriend. Then it clicked to her, that one guy, that ONE SINGLE GUY that was always there for her. She called him up, but he never answered. A year later, during the High school reunion, she spotted the guy. He was sitting down alone, drinking nothing more than water, and she walks up to him. He looks up and smiles that same smile that always comforted her and says, "need some company?" She smiles and says, "Yes, that would be lovely...Jeff((guy's name)) I've been thinking of all the things that you did for me, and it took me until now to get a hint of what you were trying to do...but I need to know...do you love me?" Jeff just sat there, not saying a word. Few minutes later, he answers her. "You know how every love story ends with a happily ever after? And you know how every fairy tale love story has action speaking louder than words? Well, why should I say I love you, when I can express it in endearment and loving you? I do love you, and I'll just continue expressing my love whenever you need it." From that point on, they were happy together. Patience is a virtue one said. Even in Love, patience is key, for without patience, only ruin lies in a relationship's future. Of course there are very few relationships that can argue with this statement, most of the time, this statement is true. Don't rush it, just give the impression and actually MEAN IT, that you love her and will be there for her. Sorry for wasting your time with the story, but I felt like this would help more than what I can actually type. Like I said, actions speak louder than words. ALL THE TIME!!  |
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Re: I need advise (update)
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@Dark: that was a nice story, although clichéd. o.O and 9 years?! O.o zomg! lol! true story? err... . . . . . . . i feel like i'm getting sick with all these love thingies. i'm still 4 years old~ T-T this is getting all clichéd and eewy for me... o.o forgot why i came here though... makes me remember that life is... oh, forget it. XD you won't understand anyway! anywhoo... *runs away*
*insert epic picture here* |
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Re: I need advise (update)
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by
on 2007-04-23 13:34:25 |
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It depends on the outcome emotion of both the boyfriend and girlfriend. Since we're talking about you and your [female] friend here, forget about the boyfriend (as in discussing about him). Now, here's a few options. If she's upset, then you should be there for her as in a "friend" only and don't hesitate to hug her and whatnot but don't try to like "go in for the kill". Now, with that, sometimes people play it risky and just go right in. It either ends up in the way they preferred it to be from their action or the ending result is a lost friendship or a chance of a lost friendship. Not talking for a few days, possibly never again, etc. Anything really... Now, if it was me (my shoes), I'd just simply be there for her. This stuff happens all the time (but I don't like the girl). Just talk, cheer her up maybe, get her mind off of things unless she really likes him and wants to get back together again. You say they recently broke up, well things might be a bit risky to do anything right not. Both sides are unsure of what to do, what to say, how to act, etc. to one another. The best thing that can come out of this situation in the end is you end up going out with her for what YOU believe in doing is the right thing to do, at the right given point, blah blah blah... XD Worst case scenario... you'll get knocked out by her ex/boyfriend (if they get back together) or even worst... by her. (+.+) Sometimes, things can only be decided off of your own actions. More then actions, what you feel inside. It's called your heart. Ever heard of the question, "Who'd win in a fight? The Mind or the Heart?" Well, I always went with the heart and in this specific given moment in your life, go with your heart. Then again, it depends on how pure your heart is. It either brings luck or bad luck, who knows... I'm not a heart's mind reader here. XD Maybe you can take things slow. Just hang out with her or whatever you've been doing the entire time they HAVE been going out and see how things go on from there. Avoid asking her too many questions about if they're going to go back out again, but if you can ask 'em how things are going, dude, don't make it seem like you're on the rebound when the ball has never been shot in the air yet so take it slow and steady. Keep your chin up and be proud! XD 
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Re: I need advise (update)
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by
on 2007-04-23 15:06:30 |
Just wait. Be there for her in her time of need if she is sad about it. Don't rush into things because you might make it worse.Be a friend to her right now.Once you see things getting better,then you might want to try.Just know that she might still have feelings for him. 
"The only person who'll decide my path is ME. Nobody else!" Kai Hiwatari |