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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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my burial instructions are longer than my will is. i am serious, ROQ...but i wont be able to take lessons for a few years yet...when i get on my own in collage, one of my good freinds knows an excelent sensi. sorry, i cant spell anything. no, i dont just swing it around...i have a bunch of stuff that discribes different techniques and styles. and i practise thowse.  |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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Hi, well we had the spelling bee thing and I made it to the 7th round ^_^ I did really well, it was pretty cool.
woot
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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hey, wats up, i know its been a while since i been here, but theres been alot going on. but just to update you all, i passed, i finally graduated from high school. i did what the english teacher said was impossible. go me. that was the only good thing that happened, that means im not getting kicked out. and others things. but there is still lots of things going on, especially with the one and only kitsu. nothing i can really do about anything but yeah. life is treating me good right now. but im still sad, well not sad sad, its that i have everything planned cuz i knew i was gonna fail, so i didnt plan anything in case i passed, so yeah, nothing is going the way i planned it, not that its ever gone the way i plan it. i guess this time its a good thing. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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on 2006-01-27 17:34:33 |
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Being out of high school is a major step in anyones life. Now you are i a position to make the decisions that will affect your future. Best of luck to you Ketsuki. I have not been posting here becasue what started in December is still going on. One of the companies Ranger contracts to as a guide has come under investigation by the park service for whatever reason. All of PSTs permits have been pulled and all of the guides who contract there are out of work until all of this can be sorted out. In addition all of the guides who contract to PST to do tours in JT National Park have been cited. Ranger was cited for calling himself ranger as in a the title. It's a nickname and he doesn't call himself that other people do. This is ridiculous. He's very depressed and right now he want's to know what he did since he has no idea what is going on. Unfortunately the best person to help us is on vacation so Ranger's Onee-chan is going to help. Last night it was terrible. He want's to know what he has done to deserve this kind treatment after doing tours into the park for 4 years. Raising funds, supporting the park and a lot more. I can't tell you how devastated he is right now and how damaging this is to him.  |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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on 2006-01-27 19:25:02 |
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Kesuki, Yea you passed! Good job, doing the supossidly impossible is fun isn't it. Schala, also a good academic achivement. Never really liked spelling myself. At least you're good at it. Nightmare, good to see that your feeling better. One of my friends just got his black-belt in Kali. I can still kick his butt though. Moonstone, that was the first time I looked for it, Sachiel reminded me of it when he said his background was from AIR. Rin for the first time in a long while I don't know how to say what I want to say. Sometimes less words leave more an impression than more so I leave you with this poem and a link to others like it. How do you cope with nopes, with fallen hopes, with must-haves that go poof in the night? Do you glum out and turn numb? I do, for a while. Join me. How can you know what you don't know? You need answers, but all you hear is the inside of your head. Do you worry? I do, for a while. Join me. Is happiness just beyond the next locked gate, and no one around with key or hammer? Do you fantasize with fruitless wishing? I do, for a while. Join me. When trouble somehow dissolves from notice and leaves you breathing free again, do you smile a breath of thank you into the One? I do, for a while. Join me. By Alan Harris |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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wow, im so happy for you ketsuki! congratulations! im just so happy to hear your not getting kicked out. give ranger my best...it sounds like it is compleatly unfair...he devoted alot to that park and now he is getting kicked for it...how awful! i think im over Lucy's death now...well, i dont think i will ever forget her...but i don't want to forget her...but im not depressed about it anymore. im depressed about something else now...its my drivers road test...i want to get my liscence before Alyssa...its a pride thing. but, i don't know...it seems easy (just today, mike passed it near-perficly)but my low self esteem is getting the better of me...i keep thinking that im going to fail and waste $50..then get yelled at for it...i know i could do it if i tryed...but i dont know, it seems to have gone beyond nervious...plus my dad seems to say things to me that i interprate as an insult, but really isnt one...im really sorry about yelling at him...but...well i havent been able to meditate at all and because of that i have a really short temper... i guess i just have to focus a little better... |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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i hope that all ranger problems get fixed soon, i think its wrong what they are doing to him after all he is done for the park. nightmare, sory about lucy's death, i know its a little late but i had to say it. and about the road test, dont worry about, just try to relax, it isnt hard. dirtyninja, it is fund doing the impossible. especially when it takes you by surprize. i dont know what to say. except that i have to call kitsu, or i wont hear the end of it. now that im not at school anymore, now that she doesnt see me is when she strats to open up. i think she is doing it on purpose, oh well, she said that she wants me to call her every night so i wont forget, she says she refuses to let me forget. she is a complicated person. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by AnimeAngel27
on 2006-01-28 18:20:27
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Ketsuki-yea you're back, i was beginning to wonder where you went off to. Congrats oon passing! Things never seem to go the way anyone plans, but this is a good twist instead of a bad one! Rin-I'm so sorry to hear about Ranger, and you were just getting over your illness and everything, it's a cruel world we live in. I hope everything turns out all right, keep us posted! Ninja-That was a beautiful poem! Very inspiring.. nightmare- that's good to hear that yur doing better! as fr your road test, i don't know if where you live if they do things differently or not but when i took my test you didn;t pay before the test, you paid once you passed. And I don't remember it being 50 either. It's only been less then half a year since i got my liscnece too, weird that i can't really remember. As for it's difficulty, there's a lot of people that will pass on the first try, if you practice and keep calm you'll do fine, and if not there's always a next time, it took me twice to pass mine oersonally but that's because of my manuverability. and I'm not sure if u have to do parallel parking or manuverability or neither, but what ever you do just practice and tell yourself that no matter what happens it will all be alright. Just stay cool! and good luck! Schala-Congratulations on making it so far into your competition, your good i don't think i'd make it past the first round in a spelling bee, but that's cause I can't spell for crap, lol, so u must be kind of smart then huh? well it's so exciting to see so many happy faces, unfortunately there's still some bad news. (Aside from Rin and Rangers of course, though there's is worse then mine) I talked to my counseler again and she said my teachers all made a deal with me about assing 11th grade. Each one gave me a grade I'd have to acheive this semester (including both quarters) in order to pass, and some of them were near impssible for me. I have to get an A in English, a high B or low A in Chemistry (which is alright because i got a B last wuarter even after missing all those school days) a high B low A in Government which is near impossible for me, I'm not very good with understanding governments, especially that of other countries, and then I have to get an A in math and math has never been my strong point. I'm a really bad test taker, I'll study really well and then come time for tests I completely freeze up. Except in chemistry for some odd reason or another i have no problems in that class i completely understand everything.. I'm in band and spanish as well. Luckily band is an easy A, you just play in class and ur fine, and i won't have to worry about spanish cause my teacher said we'll work on it together, he's really nice, and very understanding about everything... oh but some of these grades are so depressing, now it seems there is no way i'll be graduating from high school the same year as my friends... i wish i was a little smarter then maybe school wouldn't be so difficult for me. Well that is about it for me, hope everyone else is doing well and has some good news to share. I like hearing good news, unfortunately i had none to share...
"Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have any film..." "Friends are the people who know everything about you and still put up with you!" "Nothing in life is free, even death costs us."
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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on 2006-01-28 18:28:15 |
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Poor Ranger and Lady Rin, one thing after another for the both of you it seems. I really hope everything works out, it usually tends to. Things are so unfair in this world, the good are punished while the wicked thrive...and there's nothing anyone can do as long as greed plays such a huge role in things. I wish the both of you the best, please be strong. @Schala, great job! W-O-N-D-E-R-F-U-L! @Nightmare, you can do it! Do worry about what COULD go wrong, keep thinking of what WILL go right! Last but not least, @Ketsuki, excellent job! You're done with Part 1 of your life! The hardest part remains, but if you managed to pass high school when no one else thought you could, life should be cake for ya! Banzai! Hmmmm, well, good luck everyone! |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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on 2006-01-28 19:21:24 |
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Nightmare, driver's test are easy, alomost as easy as Paris Hilton, oh did I say that out loud. Seriously, if life were a drivers test everyone would be happy; nervous, but happy. Just stay under the speed limit, and drive normally you'll come out fine. Ketsuki, no one said women were simple. If I had a dollar for every time I heard that... She obviously cares about you otherwise she probibly wouldn't care if you called or not. Unforuneatly women are complex, very complex, too complex sometimes. Women are like oranges; thier outsides are horible(except for the scent), but once you take away the peal they're good for you and taste good. Becareful though, peel to ambitiosly and you'll get spat at in the eye, and your eye will sting for hours. Angel, good luck on your grades. I find it interesting that you're good at chemistry, but not math. Seeing as how chemstry is very math intesive. Just so you know, studing for anything past geometry is bad. Especially if you don't understand something. So much of math is based upon what you leared the day before. If you don't build a strong foundation for math then you'll have a challengeing time with every thing after that. Just wondering how do you study? I have some good tips for it if you want them. "Intelligence" has nothing to do with school. Just have common sense and you'll do just fine. The smartest people in the world, probably would get average grades in your average school. It's all because of the way it's set up. That rant is for anther time *sigh*. You do have good news, you have a chance of graduating with your friends. Remember, hope is the recognition of a possibility. So as long as something is possible, then you have hope. So always have hope, no matter the situation. On that note let's have a joke to lighten the mood.  The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer; she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, he's a doctor.'" A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher; ...she's dead." |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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on 2006-01-28 21:18:17 (edited 2006-01-28 21:20:38)
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Thank you very much Ninja, that was very sweet. It seemed that things were going all right for us and I'll say the charges against our daughter Mu have been dropped so there is that off our heads only now this thing with the park service is driving Ranger insane. We have friends trying to help, among them the magazine and hi-desert paper he write for. ONly I don't know what they can do to help. (I could post last months article if you wish). Today Jerry of PST, our tour manager, and the guides had a meeting over breakfast. Since PST is really the focal point for all of this we all still want ot know what's going on. Understand that we are all friends and we have known and worked with each other for years. Jerry (PST) is the glue that holds us together and if he folds we all do as well. He has no clue as to what's going on, only that he is being investigated as a result of a complaint that was filed saying he was operating without permits. Only we all know we have permits since we have to file a standard permit form everytime we pay a fee and enter the park. Jerry's attornies are trying to find out what this is about and so is Rangers sister (she's an attorney too) only wehave no answers as of yet. In the meantime we have to come up with the money for new permits which is going to be difficult since there is nothing coming in to pay for. Right now we are living on what I make, his military pension/disability and our savings. I don't know how long we can keep this up before we really start to feel the pinch. I don't know what to do and at this point I'll listen to anything since it is also starting to having a major affect on me as well. In the meantime both hi-desert radio stations are now covering this along with the paper and it's all unwanted publicity. We want to live quietly, alone and in peace only that's not happening. After his meeting this morning Ranger called and he was barely to control his anxeity and agitation. I stayed on the phone with him until he went out of cell coverage. He took a xanax when he got home and has been in a state ever since just wanting to know what he has done to have his permit pulled and to have to go through the permitting process as well as the expense of filing the new permits when we just renewed our permits in November. That means paying twice for permits this year in addition to losing 30-60 days of work depending on how long they take to process the permits. Some businesses close because things like this happens and we can't afford to close it is all we have. I want him to feel better tonight. I'm going to get ready for bed now. Dress up cute, sexy and pretty for him. Make him feel nice, love him, make love to him if he will have me and try not to feel disappointed if he won't. ET I said to you in another post about our love and the good times. Our love has survived bad times as well and this is one of the bad times so I have to be there for him. Goodnight. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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Oh, Lady Rin I am sorry to hear of your difficult time. Goodluck and my thoughts are with you guys.
woot
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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Good luck with your sword techniques Nightmare, dont hesitate to use them on any baddies you might face. The drivers test is so easy, don't even worry about it. I didn't practice at all and I passed. Wow Ketsuki, thats nice. Now all you need to do is get Kitsu to be your girlfriend. Good luck with that, hey you did pass maybe other surprises are in store. I would love to see you come in her saying Kitsu finally accepted to be your girlfriend. Don't give up on that, you've done the impossible once already Its sad that society punishes good deeds, I hope Ranger gets his job back and a raise too. I wish luck to you AnimeAngel, you may just pull off a Ketsuki and pass too.I am good at math but bad at chemistry, because I suck at pluging in to those stupid formulas. That and I never studied, did my work, or payed attention. Maybe you should make a thread entitled "Help me with my homework." I will be your motivational tutor, everyone else can be your real ones.  Jomunga eats your avatars. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by AnimeAngel27
on 2006-01-28 22:24:40
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Help me with my hw sounds very suiting. I may actually do that. Thanks for the idea Jomunga. I hope I can pull this off as well as Ketsuki did. Rin stay strong for Ranger! We're all rooting for you guys. I will pray for you and Ranger and hope for the best... if only there was more I could do. I feel so very useless. Ketsuki- good luck with Kitsu. Dirtyninja-My chemistry teacher told me the same thing, that chemistry is based off of a lot of math. he told me that I was very weird for being able to do so well in his class and not in my math class. But for some reason things in chemistry just seem to fit so well and make sense. It's weird really. I wish I could have things fall into place as esaily in math as they do in chem. As for how I study, depending on the materials I make note cards, lots of notes. Writing things down a few times helps submit it to memory. I do the homework as well as some extra practice problems if i can find them and for some classes I run over my notes of that day even if there is no upcomng test that week or something. I don't know if all that is right or good so I'm open to any suggestions from anyone really! Thanks to everyone for the good luck wishes. I'll let you know as the end of the school year begins to loom closer how it all went. And I won't give up hope... I feel very inspired right now... hmm maybe that's cause it's 2 am, o well inspiration strikes at the weirdest of moments!
"Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have any film..." "Friends are the people who know everything about you and still put up with you!" "Nothing in life is free, even death costs us."
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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on 2006-01-28 22:40:27 |
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Hey Angel-san, you have a somewhat similar issue as I do. I'm taking Honors Chem and Honors Geometry. Chem. is easy for me, but Geo comes hard, since I've never particularly enjoyed math. I agree, chemistry does involve a great deal of math, however, it's kinda of a scripted math that follows a set logic. I find that simple to grasp and enjoy my chem class a lot. As for Euclidian geometry, it's a class I'm doing merely okay in. I find this class top be pointless. The teacher even told the class that at the end of the year we should "throw all your notes away, you're never gonna use them again". Once again I wish everyone the best! |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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on 2006-01-28 22:48:12 |
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Hahahahahaha, Roq has geometry, oh that is good, hahahahahaha. Ok I'm done now. Have you done definitions yet, our class took 20 minutes to get point. I hated that class so much. Oh well in the past now, on to Adv Pre calc ugh. Angel, try making minmonic devices, i.e. In german I came up with hintin back(sounds like get in back), to remember the dort hintin means "in the back." You remember things that make you laugh. Also studding the night befor and getting over 8 hours of sleep helps to cement things you leared that day. Don't get over 9 or you'll be too tiered. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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on 2006-01-28 22:56:15 |
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Very funny dirtyninja-san, and yes, since it's an honors class, we are FAR past something as trivial as a point. I believe we are concluding the paralleslism and convex parallelogram unit. Half the class switched back to regular geometry after the first semester, I stayed. I despise the class, love the teacher(he's funny, so food obssessed) Is Pre-Calc any better? I took french, I wish we had a Japanese class though. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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on 2006-01-28 23:08:13 |
| Probibly shoud say that I'll have that ADV Pre Calc, Adv. chem, possibly AP physics, and ADV ameriacn history next semester, so much fun to look foward too huh? Stop the pain, the therems, postulates, there're comming back fo me. Ah, the proofs, *sobs* the proofs. I'd rater do those than maticies, or coplex number, or a whole list of insanely hard problems. You know things are hard when your teacher gives you 4 problems to do in 45 minutes. |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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im going to practice my driving today...i am sure ill do fine. ranger and rin...just hang in their! i am sure that your love for each other will conquer all (althoguh that last part was a trifle more than i needed to know...heh) if you really start to get in bad shape please tell me...you would be amased how amy connections a guy can make when all he has to do is talk to people on his computer...but i don't want to ask people unless i absolutly HAVE to...and i do not think that it will get that bad. my advice would be, rin, to stay together as much as possible...even when you have nothing, if you still have each other, you will find a way to survive.... |
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Re: The Depression Thread Continued
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by desertranger
on 2006-01-29 08:35:09
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I posted in the love thread gefore I got here and found Rin wrote. "want him to feel better tonight. I'm going to get ready for bed now. Dress up cute, sexy and pretty for him. Make him feel nice, love him, make love to him if he will have me and try not to feel disappointed if he won't" We didn't mmake love and I don't think she was disappointed. She was/is extremely worried abotu aqll of this. It is difficult for her to understand much less cope with my mood swings. She doesn't understand it anymore than I do. Emotionally I am in very tight control and it's getting more and more difficult to maintain that control outside of our place here. When it breaks loose she no longer knows what to do and that causes her pain. Yesterday it got loose after the meeting in the car and I almost lost control. I think I broke a record driving up the mountain yesterday(I have a video driving down online if you want to see it). Right now I'm calm but I have to go down the mountain to see Jerry; not business after all we are also friends and we do go into the desert to play around and unwind. Today we unwind with guns. Heavy shit. 7mm magnum, .308m .50 cal BMG OK I've said enough. I'm just rambling anyway. |