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Re: Post-A-Poem
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by
 SkyAlchemist
on 2006-05-15 20:00:31 |
Come on Doc, I want quality reading.     |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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If ti says untitled then chaces are it's something I scribbled without thinking about it. I really only title works I put some effort into. That onewas written on the back of the page wtih Atomic Heart Meltdown. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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by
SkyAlchemist
on 2006-05-15 19:52:21 |
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My bad, I accidently pushed quick reply... Amyway, Doc, I feel like this one is missing something, maybe angsty or whatever it is you call it. It's not bad, it's just dull. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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(Untitled) I keep you near me, in the back of my mind. No seperate anxiety just biding my time. Alone in my room I sware that I'm fine. Just a flawed human made in god's own design. Do you remember beyond the photographs? Temporary injuries and shadows that never passed. Please won't you free me from this hole six feet deep, and take me back to happiness conently to sleep. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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by
on 2006-05-14 21:01:08 |
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Post a Poem?? here it goes... Heaven It’s a risk having you here in my arms Even though you said that you meant no harm The problem is… you’re not allowed to be with me Because you’re an angel and we’re not meant to be It is like stealing from God when I am with you But what can I say? You’re just too good to be true I can’t even take my eyes away from your face Your angelic face made beautiful by God’s grace How can I say this in front of your curious eyes? That I made a crime that no one can compromise I took you away from your peaceful lair And here you are, touching my yellow hair. If I will be punished because of that I’d rather accept it than give you back Because it feels like hell if you are gone Because you’re my heaven, my only one  |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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Really? Nooo... Surely not... Untitled Two Did you listen to me? When you walked away? I still remember the gleaming in your eye the way you smiled at me the way you watched me die. I was holding on forever trying to convince myself there was still hope for you. The wanting has destroyed me time has now deied me hopelessness will find me. All the rumors your friends told you all the rumors are true. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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by
SkyAlchemist
on 2006-05-14 20:27:23 (edited 2006-05-14 20:33:39)
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It was sad not depressing... You know, I get the feeling we are the only ones who post in this thread. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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You'll have to forgive the typos,that was a hell of a lot to write. Again. Either way, was it not depressing? That's good. I'm glad you liked it. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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by
SkyAlchemist
on 2006-05-14 20:21:20 |
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That wasn't depressing...Wow, you actually wrote something non-depressive. Not taking into consideration the typos, I loved it. Skies has just become my favorite. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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-Skies My skies are blue Fading away to shades of grey And I miss you and I don't want to feel this way. I told a lie When I said everything's OK and I can't decide whether or not to that I should say I love you every moment of every day. Can you see? Can you see my heartfelt effort? dripping honesty with each note. Can you still turn your back and say goodbye or would you stay Realise what I say is true that my skies are blue. Can you see? Can you see my state of being? Can you still say I'm only dreaming if so don't wake me I've given up In dreams at least you love me too all in here my skies are blue. In the gentle snow made of love notes slowly burning I hope you know the heart just keeps on yearning. AndI miss you so Loving you and slowly learning how it hurts to try to let go And cloud these skies of blue Or am I dreaming so? Can you feel? Can you feel this hope I'm keeping. I don't know, if the dream comes as I'm sleeping try to clarify my dreams at night from what I see at day. At night do you dream too? Dreaming that your skies are blue? Could you say, could you say that you still love me? Or am I really living in my own fantasy? Tunnel without light under a clouded sky I still cry I love you even as my dreams fade, my skies are blue. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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on 2006-05-13 22:30:27 |
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ahemm.. to post a poem i need to smoke and think about yesterdays quotes about things that brings happiness and laughter to my minisize brain i got everything i nid a table of pizza and one case of beer together with my peers going in for the thrill moving on for the kill ~.. its one of those days where my brain starts to think seriously! nyahhahhaa!!  |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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by
SkyAlchemist
on 2006-05-13 20:30:49 |
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How realistic Wait Forever is...unfortunatly. Made me remember things I've tried to forget but anyway, what a good job you did with that one. Can't relate to Myself, along to home but it's okay. *Gasps*Doc, is it possible your losing inspiration? (yes, it's sarcasm) |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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Don't worry. I have to go back and fix my posts all the time... -Myself, along to home With my life's last little hope I laugh at the sordid joke find humour in the misery and loss. Your friends say you're aware but you probabally don't care or really have those feelings for me. I stand on Bishop's Row knowing full well where I'll go and the answer is simply far away. I can't bear to stay around I feel I only hold you down I think you'll be better without me. With my life's lastlittle hope I laugh at the sordid joke find homour in the failure that's me. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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ERRR TYPO!!!!!.........Tragic became Tragig....-_-;.  |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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Does that mean you don't want any comments? Because not to accept criticism is folly... I thought it was good... |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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Hmmmmmmmmmmm i'll try to put this....(so dont give stoopid comments) So the world knew a tragic fate We were draining the deadly sea And the scenes were indeed too sad Only prayers were taking lead The Acid Rain is burning Right into your eyes Again your dreams may loose the glow Allow the sorrow of your thougths to meet sunrise And shall the hopefull words Bring love inside your heart |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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We were a punk band. Seventeen songs in fifteen minutes or your money back. I'm moving into writing Ska and Emo songs to... but punk holds a special place in my heart. Alright, Checklist was a loser huh? How about some more traditional Doctor? -(Don't Expect Me To) Wait Forever What were the words you said to me? When you said goodbye I contained the jealosy and you witheld the lie. Now our world is ending stars rain from the sky Now you're free sostop pretending Leave me alone to die. Time rubbed salt into wounds I'mthe one that ends up screwed. You said you loved me but you don't know why. Insencere, the tear that falls from your eye. Your heart bleeds your want to be together In your eyes so blue But don't expect me to wait forever for you. You were the on to turn away put an end to it all. I'm the one who said to stay, you didn't even stall. Now you tell me your were wrong in your last midnight call. As I put the words to song It's you who'll take the fall. You still laugh with your friends then tear up to suit your own ends. And I'm the fool that nearly brought you back into my life! You shed tears as my heart withers But don't expect me to wait forever. Stand close to me, keep me warm give me hope and I'll adore you teach me to feel alive so when you're gone our hearts both die. Time rubbed salt into wounds I'm the one who ends up screwed. You said you love me but you don't know why Insencere the tear that falls from your eye. We cry for thing to change yet we know they'll never. Please don't expect me to wait forever. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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by
SkyAlchemist
on 2006-05-12 20:21:48 |
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This isn't the first time you mention your band, what kind of music do you play? Anyway, on with the topic, Doc, you have better material. The Checklist seems like a bunch of random ideas put together to make only one. Well at least that's what it seems to me. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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Not surprising. The untitled one came from the margin of some old sociology notes I was throwing out. Here's an old song from my band... (Ifound my old notebook so expect a lot of stuff from me...) -The Checklist Odds are up to 3 to 1, nobody's left on my side. I've done all the damage I could've done now I just try to pass time. Mainstream socitey turned it's back on me Counter-cultures warm embrace threatens to consume me. Spike the punch with cyannide make the wires cross. A hunger for genocide, society's at a loss. Of all my friends I'm the one that never fit in. In the back of the room, checklist of the deadly sins. I won't live to long, but I've accepted things this way. The real world shut the door so now I live dangerously. |
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Re: Post-A-Poem
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by
SkyAlchemist
on 2006-05-12 20:06:24 |
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To YoYo: Let me guess, is it about trying to stay free? (crazy guess, I know) To Doctor: About showing your feelings, it's fine if you don't after all, you express yourself through your writtings. To late to abort was good, nice touch with the numbers. Especially loved the ending. I did not like the untitled one. Somethings missing... As for Unwell, dear boy, I felt that way a few months ago! |